Air travel causes environmental pollution, so many people believe that there should be an increase in the price of air tickets in order to reduce air traffic. Do you agree or disagree?
Whilst the advantages of
air
travel
were visible, there were also
disadvantages that arose from this
mode of transportation, specifically, air
pollution
. It is believed by some people that increasing fare
for Fix the agreement mistake
fares
air
travel
would reduced
the Change the verb form
reduce
pollution
to the environment. It is disagreed that an increase on
Change preposition
in
price
of Add an article
the price
air
tickets would give solutions to the problem as travelling through
Change preposition
by
air
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
big
impact on the economic state of the world.
Add an article
a big
Firstly
, air
travel
still
the fastest way to go to places in a short period of time.The people can go to different places away from home without travelling too long and commodities were be delivered on time. Add a missing verb
is still
For example
, during the covid- 19 in 2020, there were no vaccine
available in the market for us, Fix the agreement mistake
vaccines
we
Correct word choice
so we
need
to buy from Wrong verb form
needed
other country
the vaccine needed to cure the disease. It will take time to reach our country if it is not delivered through Change the wording
another country
other countries
air
travel
.
Secondly
, it is already proven that air
travel
has big
impact on the economic state. Add an article
a big
For instance
, the taxes come
from an Correct pronoun usage
that come
air
travel
company would benefit the economy and can be used for other improvements of the government. In addition
to that, it is unsure that the increase in air
tickets would hinder the
people Correct article usage
apply
to
Change preposition
from travelling
travel
as travelling is very essential nowadays.
In conclusion, it is disagreed that Correct article usage
an increased
increased
Replace the word
increase
for
Change preposition
in
air
tickets will be imposed to reduce air
pollution
, but, the authority handling this
can do some solutions regarding the problem of pollution
.Submitted by rodadoctor2 on
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task achievement
Try to elaborate on your main points with more detailed examples and explanations to strengthen your argument.
task achievement
Work on varying your sentence structures and using more sophisticated language to achieve greater clarity and engagement.
coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear topic sentence for each paragraph and maintain a logical progression of ideas throughout the essay.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving transitions between paragraphs to create a smoother flow and stronger connections between your ideas.
task achievement
You have presented a clear opinion and stayed consistent with it throughout the essay.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which frame your arguments well.
task achievement
The examples you provided, such as during COVID-19, were relevant to your argument.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?