Some people think that is a wast of time fir high school students to study literature, such as novels and poems. To what extent do you agree or disagree.
Some people believe that novels and poems it is not
a
crucial Correct article usage
apply
subject
in school and they consider Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
as
Correct your spelling
a
wasting
Replace the word
waste
for
time. In Change preposition
of
this
essay, I will discuss my aspects of view, and explain that
in detail.
On the one hand, the implementation of these subjects in the curriculum Correct pronoun usage
them
have
a great impact on Change the verb form
has
students
education. Furthermore
, there is a strong correlation between Correct article usage
the inserting
inserting
of Replace the word
insertion
this
subject and broad horizons of learning on
the Change preposition
for
students
. In addition
, it is beneficial for teenagers to increase their knowledge about history
of poems and various Add an article
the history
type
of it. Fix the agreement mistake
types
For instance
, United
Correct article usage
the United
State
inserted Fix the agreement mistake
States
these material
for high schools recently and they Change the determiner
this material
these materials
notice
how it affected Wrong verb form
noticed
on
Change preposition
apply
students
indirectly and raised there
level and encouraged them Replace the word
their
for reading
more.
Change preposition
to read
On the other hand
, inserting of
these Change preposition
apply
subject
in high school could be Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
waste
Correct article usage
a waste
for
their time because senior Change preposition
of
students
they mostly prepare
Wrong verb form
prepared
in
Change preposition
apply
this
year for college application
and they need or Fix the agreement mistake
applications
sped
more hours on it, Correct your spelling
spend
Also
, because there is another science Correct pronoun usage
that need
need
their focus Correct subject-verb agreement
needs
such
as math and physics. For example
, Saudi Arabia they
ignore the existence of Correct pronoun usage
apply
these literature
and pay more attention Change the determiner
this literature
for
biology which in a direct way Change preposition
to
raise
the Correct subject-verb agreement
raises
student
levels and their understanding.
In conclusion, I completely agree with ignoring the Fix the agreement mistake
students
excite
of these materials because there Replace the word
excitement
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
another
sides of learning Replace the adjective
other
need
attention. Correct pronoun usage
that need
While
the benefit effect of it on enhancing their desire to read and encourage
them more Wrong verb form
encouraging
but
in Correct word choice
apply
Correct article usage
a significantly
significantly
way it consumes time .Change the word
significant
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coherence cohesion
Your essay has good points, but it needs to have a clearer structure and more logical connections between paragraphs. Work on organizing your ideas more clearly to enhance coherence.
coherence cohesion
The introduction is too brief and does not give a clear thesis statement or outline the main points to be discussed. Try to be more specific in your introduction about what you will cover in the essay.
task achievement
You need to add more support and detail to your main points to make them more convincing. Providing additional examples and explanations will strengthen your argument.
task achievement
Your essay attempts to address the prompt and you have provided some strong points on both sides of the argument.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion restates your position and summarizes the main points discussed in the essay.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.
‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.
Examples:
I really want to study but I’m too tired.
I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.
If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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