In the future, nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
In these
days, many companies want to monopolize their product to have the maximum profit .So that the innovations are Change preposition
These
neccessary
Correct your spelling
necessary
such
as develop their policies , customer service, etc...Personally this
development is positve
.
First of all, the majority of the Correct your spelling
positive
customer
prefer to buy Fix the agreement mistake
customers
a
latest Change the article
the
products
. The companies have taken that advantage that the customer want
to show off that they have the Change the verb form
wants
on trend
Add a hyphen
on-trend
products
so they created
new Wrong verb form
create
version
of their Fix the agreement mistake
versions
products
every year.
Secondly
, to make their products
stand out from the crowd they make them unique not only attracting more buyers but also
help
the businesses to rebrand their Wrong verb form
helping
apperance
in the Correct your spelling
appearance
costumers'
eyes. Correct your spelling
customers'
For example
like
the Apple corporation Change preposition
apply
they have
changed Wrong verb form
has
their
logo many Correct pronoun usage
its
time
. Fix the agreement mistake
times
As a result
, they made their brand more recogniton
over time.
Correct your spelling
recognition
On the other hand
, just look at Apple they make the
new Correct article usage
apply
products
every year but their products
just
similar to Add a missing verb
are just
a
previous Correct article usage
the
one
and the Correct pronoun usage
ones
price
are always Fix the agreement mistake
prices
increase
, they just change their Wrong verb form
increasing
the
design after 3 years when their latest Correct article usage
apply
products
have
released. They just want to make more money with no Verb problem
are
efforts
to change the design.
In conclusion, the innovations in each Fix the agreement mistake
effort
corporations
is extremely important Change to a singular noun
corporation
to
against other competitors to earn the maximum profits. I think Change preposition
apply
this
trend to emphasizes the company should continuing
so it can bring more positive things to the consumers and the companies need to stop their fallacy that they have nothing to change and think they can make money on their old ideas.Wrong verb form
continue
Submitted by jakelong16091994 on
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task achievement
While your introduction presents a general idea of what your essay is about, it could be more specific and should clearly state your position regarding the statement about printed newspapers and books.
task achievement
Your body paragraphs need more focus on the issue of printed newspapers and books being replaced by online reading. You tend to shift towards discussing product innovation and monopolies, which is not directly related to the topic.
task achievement
Provide more developed and relevant examples that specifically address the topic. For instance, mention how technology impacts people's reading habits or discuss trends in digital and print media.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving the logical flow of your essay. Ensure that each paragraph clearly follows from the previous one, and that all points are logically connected to your main thesis.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has some repetition of ideas and lacks clear connections between different points. Use linking words and phrases to connect ideas better.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion which is good for maintaining reader engagement.
task achievement
You have demonstrated an understanding of the importance of innovation in business, which shows you have knowledge relevant to the topic.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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