IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

You were absent from an important event held by the company you work for. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter: Apologize for your absence and explain the reasoning. Explain why you had to be at the other event. Explain what you will do to catch up.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Dear Mr. A, I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to apologize
you
Change preposition
to you
show examples
, that I could not attend the inauguration
event
Use synonyms
 of the new branch opening in Pathankot, Jammu, on September 2nd. Sadly, on the date of
foundation
Add a comma
foundation,
show examples
 there was another special
event
Use synonyms
 in our Punjab region to recognize the branches and the staff members who performed exceptionally well in the
last
Linking Words
 financial year. I was co-managing the
event
Use synonyms
 with the other colleague and my presence was required here.
Additionally
Linking Words
, I was the
in-charge
Correct your spelling
charge
show examples
 of the catering
arrangement
Fix the agreement mistake
arrangements
show examples
 made for the employees and their family members. I feel delighted to share that
award
Correct article usage
the award
show examples
event
Use synonyms
 was a great success. I genuinely wanted to attend the inauguration as we have achieved another milestone and I am eager to meet the new
recruitees
Correct your spelling
recruiters
show examples
, for a brief introduction. I am sure you will take the branch to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
new heights and will make the whole team proud. Once again, congratulations
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the opening of new branch premises. I look forward to meeting you soon. Yours Sincerely, JK

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement
The letter is very well-organized and addresses all parts of the task. You explained your absence, the importance of the other event, and your steps to catch up. However, adding a bit more detail about what specific actions you will take to catch up might make it more complete.
Coherence and Cohesion
To improve further, ensure each paragraph focuses on a single idea to maintain clear and distinct separation of thoughts. Consider breaking down sentences that introduce multiple points.
Task Achievement
You have a polite and professional tone throughout the letter, which is very suitable for writing to a manager.
Coherence and Cohesion
The letter is logically structured, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
Coherence and Cohesion
The greeting and closing are appropriately used, adding to the formality and professionalism of the letter.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: