IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

The plans below show a harbour in 2000 and how it looks today. Summerise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#plans #show #harbour #summerise #information #features #comparisons
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The given maps compare the challenges of
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Porth Harbour in 2000 and in the present day.
Overall
Linking Words
,it is clear
by contrast
Linking Words
 that,most of the
chalenges
Correct your spelling
challenges
 related
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
 expanding
dock
Correct article usage
the dock
show examples
 and adding many facilities. As the maps illustrate,there is a private beach with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
access
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
hotel
Correct article usage
the hotel
show examples
 which is in the southeast of
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 harbour
while
Linking Words
 it
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
was for
public
Add an article
the public
show examples
 in the past.
However
Linking Words
,there was
castle
Add an article
a castle
the castle
show examples
 which
was
Verb problem
had
show examples
 not used for a long time was changed to
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 hotel with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
access
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the
road
Use synonyms
.Meanwhile,over the
Use synonyms
road
Add a comma
road,
show examples
 there
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 new cafes and shops which were constructed in the empty place.
By contrast
Linking Words
,in the east of the main
road
Use synonyms
 there
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 Marine private yachts which
replaced
Add a missing verb
were replaced
show examples
into
Change preposition
by
show examples
 fishing
boals
Correct your spelling
boats
 which
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 in the southeast now.Facilities namely showers and toilets
as well as
Linking Words
car
Correct article usage
the car
show examples
 park were not changed over the past years.Obviously,there is no access on the
road
Use synonyms
Change preposition
to sothewestern
show examples
sothewestern
Correct your spelling
southwestern
 carpark
while
Linking Words
 showers and toilets were built over it.The dock which was nearby the public beach was extended.
Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on

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coherence cohesion
You should strive to improve the logical flow of your essay. Present your points in a more organized way to make it easier for the reader to follow. In particular, mentioning major changes one by one in a structured manner would help enhance clarity.
coherence cohesion
Work on constructing clearer topic sentences and ensure each paragraph flows smoothly from one to the next. Use linking words and phrases effectively to create a more cohesive response.
task achievement
Ensure that each point you make is fully supported by examples. Instead of clustering information about new facilities and changes together, discuss each one separately with sufficient detail.
task achievement
Double-check for errors in grammar, spelling, and punctuation; these can often be distracting and may detract from your overall message.
task achievement
You provided a clear summary of the maps showing changes between 2000 and the present day.
task achievement
Your essay attempts to cover all major changes, showing a comprehensive understanding of the task.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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