IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people prefer to live in a house, while others feel that there are more prons to living in an apartment. Are there more advantages than disadvantages of living in a house compared with living in an apartment? give reasons for your answers and give relevant examples

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is argued that some individual prefers
houses
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 others are in favour of living in
Use synonyms
appartments
Correct your spelling
apartments
. Both have their own advantages and disadvantages. I completely agree with the ideas and will support my opinion in
this
Linking Words
 essay with examples. Nowadays every person
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 their own choices.
People
Use synonyms
 believe that living in
house
Correct article usage
a house
show examples
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 more prons.
Firstly
Linking Words
, it is free of cost .
While
Linking Words
 staying in
houses
Use synonyms
 you do not have to stress yourself for paying
rents
Fix the agreement mistake
rent
show examples
at the end
Linking Words
 of every month.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
renovation
Add an article
the renovation
show examples
 process is easier in homes
Linking Words
then
Correct your spelling
than
show examples
Use synonyms
Change preposition
in appartments
show examples
appartments
Correct your spelling
apartments
.
People
Use synonyms
 can make changes to the walls freely.
Thirdly
Linking Words
, the person can have full privacy which he/she
lackes
Correct your spelling
lacks
 in
flats
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
,
houses
Use synonyms
 have more space in the form of gardens. One can easily enjoy and spend time there. In
Use synonyms
flats
Add a comma
flats,
show examples
 you only have balconies that
dont
Correct your spelling
don't
 have any space and privacy.
Moreover
Linking Words
, many
people
Use synonyms
 prefer staying in buildings rather
Linking Words
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
houses
Use synonyms
. To
them
Add a comma
them,
show examples
Use synonyms
appartments
Correct your spelling
apartments
takes
Correct subject-verb agreement
take
show examples
 less place and have more security. As
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
 is increasing day by day, in order to fit
population
Correct article usage
the population
show examples
 within the country, the governments will choose
flats
Use synonyms
 over
houses
Use synonyms
 because
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
takes
Correct subject-verb agreement
take
show examples
 less space and more
people
Use synonyms
 are adjusted in one single building.
Along with
Linking Words
it
Correct pronoun usage
this
show examples
 public
also
Linking Words
 chooses
flats
Use synonyms
 because they are near
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
shopping malls.
Hence
Linking Words
, it is proven that whether you choose
houses
Use synonyms
 or
flats
Use synonyms
 to
lives
Wrong verb form
live
show examples
, both
Change preposition
in, both
show examples
 have their own positive and negative points, but
I
Correct your spelling
in
show examples
 my opinion housing is better
Linking Words
then
Correct your spelling
than
show examples
Use synonyms
appartments
Correct your spelling
apartments
 because it
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 more advantages and is
preffered
Correct your spelling
preferred
 by majorty.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Try to elaborate more on each point and provide more specific examples to support your arguments. This will improve the depth of your response.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear and distinct main idea. This will make the essay easier to follow and understand.
coherence cohesion
Be careful with spelling and grammatical errors. Proofreading will help catch mistakes like 'prons' instead of 'pros' and 'appartments' instead of 'apartments'.
task response
You presented a balanced view of both houses and apartments, acknowledging the advantages and disadvantages of each.
task response
You covered a range of points including cost, renovation ease, and privacy for houses, and space efficiency and proximity to amenities for apartments.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: