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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people say History is one of the most important schoool subjects. Othert people think that, in todays world, subjects like Science and technolog are most important than History. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #history #schoool #subjects #othert #todays #world #science #technolog
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Some people believe that History is one of the most important school
subjects
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 because it teaches us about the past, our cultures, and how societies have developed. Learning history helps students understand the mistakes made by previous generations and how to avoid them in the future. It
also
Linking Words
 fosters a sense of identity and belonging by connecting us to our heritage.
On the other hand
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, others think that
subjects
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 like
Science
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 and
Technology
Use synonyms
 are more important in today’s world. With the rapid advancement of
technology
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, these
subjects
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 are essential for innovation and solving modern-day problems. Many jobs today require a strong understanding of
science
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 and
technology
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, so focusing on these
subjects
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 can help students prepare for the future. In my opinion, both History and
Science
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 are important, but in today’s world,
science
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 and
technology
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 might be slightly more relevant because they directly impact our everyday lives and future careers.
However
Linking Words
, a balanced education that includes both
subjects
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 is essential for
overall
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 growth and understanding of the world.
Submitted by millionmiles.indonesia on

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task achievement
To enhance task achievement, consider providing more specific examples to support your points. For instance, mention particular historical events or scientific breakthroughs that illustrate the importance of history or science and technology.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes your opinion, but it could be further strengthened by reiterating the key points discussed in the essay.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, which helps in maintaining coherence.
task achievement
You have provided a balanced view by discussing both perspectives before presenting your own opinion, showing a comprehensive understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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