IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graphs below the transport modes in European city between 1960 and 2000. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

The graphs below the transport modes in European city between 1960 and 2000. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant
#graphs #transport #modes #european #city #summarise #information #features #comparisons
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The graph illustrates information about the mode of transportation people used in Europe from 1960 to 2000.
Overall
Linking Words
, European citizen were using
bus
Use synonyms
, car, bike or foot for their transportation.
However
Linking Words
, in 1960 most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people were using their feet which was just slightly under 35%.
While
Linking Words
Use synonyms
bus
Add an article
the bus
show examples
 was in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
second place
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the same year by nearly 25%.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
citizen
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
show examples
 who
using
Wrong verb form
use
show examples
 cars were only around 5
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
. As the years
are
Verb problem
went
show examples
 going,
cars user
Fix the agreement mistake
car users
show examples
is
Verb problem
apply
show examples
still
increasing
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 from year to year until they
reach
Wrong verb form
reached
show examples
 their highest peak
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2000 by more than 35%. Regarding people who were using bikes to transport, there was a
slightly
Change the adverb
slight
show examples
 decline in proportions from 1960 to 1980 by only 5 percent
while
Linking Words
 it dropped hardly during the period
of
Change preposition
from
show examples
 1980 until 2000 which reached closely
5
Change preposition
to 5
show examples
%. There were fluctuations in the
Use synonyms
bus
Correct quantifier usage
number of bus
show examples
 users, at the
begening
Correct your spelling
beginning
 there were almost 17% of the European citizen using
Use synonyms
Bus
Correct article usage
the Bus
show examples
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 1960,
then
Linking Words
is
Correct your spelling
it
show examples
 increased until it reached
it
Correct pronoun usage
its
show examples
peaked
Replace the word
peak
show examples
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 1980, after
that
Linking Words
is
Correct your spelling
it
show examples
 suddenly went down to almost 16%.
Submitted by 361109698 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words bus with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "reach" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • predominance
  • corresponding decline
  • surge
  • urbanization
  • infrastructure development
  • environmental awareness
  • resurgence
  • primary modes of transport
  • decades
  • shift in transport modes
What to do next:
Look at other essays: