IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people think that one of the ways to solve environmental problems is to increase price of fuel fir cars and vehicles. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

#people #price #fuel #fir #cars #vehicles
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It is believed that increasing the price of fuel for vehicles is an effective way to reduce environmental pollution. I fully disagree with
this
 notion
due to
 the following reasons.
To begin
 with, the first and foremost reason in
this
 context is that the higher cost of gas will not reduce the usage of vehicles.
In other words
, it will not affect the car owners.
For instance
, costly gas allows the owner to spend more at the pump, leaving less to spend on other goods and services.
Thus
, higher prices of gas have zero impact on individuals.
Furthermore
, it will increase the cost of using public transportation. Public transportation
such
 as buses, and airlines would increase their fares as they are the most important input of transportation. People still need to travel whether by their private automobiles or by public transit.
As a result
 of
this
, inflation can be caused. In the gist of the above contents, it can be concluded that increasing the price of fuel is not the only solution we need to protect our environment. There are other practices and rules that we can follow to save the environment from damage.
Submitted by harkdhaliwal00 on

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content
Develop the examples or add more specific instances to strengthen arguments.
content
Ensure each main point is consistently and clearly elaborated upon.
structure
Enhance cohesion by using more linking words and ensuring smooth transitions between ideas.
structure
Restate your stance in the conclusion with a slightly different phrasing for emphasis.
content
Clear stance on the topic from the beginning.
content
Each main point is distinct and relevant.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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