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Writing Samples
Band 7

In most successful organizations, some people believe that communications between managers and workers is important, other people said that other factors are more important. What is your opinion?

#organizations #people #communications #managers #workers #factors
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It goes without saying that
communication
 has a significant role in business development. It has been argued that in big enterprises, coordination between employees and managers is the key point of success.
However
, others claim that there are some other aspects that play a more crucial role in business progress. I believe effective
communication
 between
company
 workers is the most valuable thing. On the one hand,
communication
 between staff members in an organization is essential for its growth.
For example
, every
company
 has a hierarchy system to control everyone in the
company
. If workers have any issues, they go to their seniors, like managers or supervisors; if their seniors do not listen to their problems, how will issues be resolved? So, to overcome those problems, information-sharing platforms should be active and effective enough.
On the other hand
, several other factors, like cutting-edge technology,
company
 benefits, and highly experienced staff play a vital role in the growth of an organization.
In contrast
, if the
company
 is not able to set an effective mode of
communication
,
then
 these types of facilities will not work in a productive manner.
Therefore
, coordination is an essential aspect that cannot be winked out
while
 discussing the success factor of an org.
To conclude
,
communication
 between
company
 employees is a pivotal constraint in a corporation's growth, but there are some other factors, as advancements in technology and skilled staff have their own importance.
Submitted by gurhunjjan47 on

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relevant specific examples
Try to provide more specific examples to strengthen your arguments. This will enhance the relevance and support for your points.
supported main points
Ensure that every main point is elaborated consistently throughout the essay. Although you mentioned technology and skilled staff, the explanation can be expanded further to clarify their significance.
introduction conclusion present
You have a clear introduction and conclusion which provide a solid structure to the essay.
clear comprehensive ideas
The essay presents clear and comprehensive ideas which remain on topic throughout.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • communication channels
  • collaboration
  • productivity
  • workplace harmony
  • issue resolution
  • escalate
  • organizational culture
  • motivation levels
  • technological advancements
  • innovation
  • feedback mechanisms
  • performance evaluations
  • fairness
  • transparency
  • criteria
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