Global warming is a big concern these days. Though there has been much noise made on this issue, carbon emission is not being curtailed. Are we contributors to this issue? What solutions do you propose to counter this issue? Discuss.

Global warming has become a major issue nowadays
where
Correct word choice
and
show examples
many
people
realise that the significant
rising
Replace the word
rise
show examples
of
carbon
emission
Fix the agreement mistake
emissions
show examples
must be controlled immediately. I believe that human activities are the biggest contributor
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
global warming and some behaviour changes must be taken in order to solve
this
issue. First of all, human activities play an important role
to make
Change preposition
in making
show examples
global warming worsen. It is
due to
the fact that
people
's necessaries have been increasing in the
last
decade, aligned with the rising
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
human population.
Hence
, they have to provide a tremendous amount of raw materials which causes over-exploited of natural resources. Too much exploitation affects the
increasing
Replace the word
increase
show examples
of
carbon
emissions
that leads to global warming.
For example
, a huge demand
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
electricity intrigues some
people
to provide the cheapest energy
resoruces
Correct your spelling
resources
by mining more
coals
Fix the agreement mistake
coal
show examples
. As
result
Correct article usage
a result
show examples
, generating electricity by using coal causes bad pollution which contributes to environmental devastation. In order to solve the issue,
people
should be aware that they cannot rely too much on natural resources by switching
into
Change preposition
to
show examples
sustainable materials and
methods
.
As a result
,
carbon
emissions
can be more controllable which can avoid the global
waming
Correct your spelling
warming
.
For example
, the energy transition in industries should be taken seriously by switching to sustainable
methods
such
as solar or wind that do not produce
carbon
emissions
. In conclusion, human activities have the biggest impact on emitting
carbon
emissions
which cause global warming.
Therefore
,
people
must change their
methods
or sources into cleaner materials or
methods
in order to
avoiding
Change the verb
avoid
show examples
global warming getting worse.
Submitted by bhaswarawira on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Consider providing more varied and detailed examples to support your points further. This will help to make your arguments more convincing and comprehensive.
coherence cohesion
Work on refining your sentence structures and checking for minor grammatical errors to enhance clarity and precision.
task achievement
Ensure to elaborate on each main point thoroughly, slightly expanding on how suggested solutions can be practically implemented and their potential impact.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which provides a good structure for the reader.
task achievement
You discussed the significant impact of human activities on global warming and solution proposals in a convincing manner, maintaining relevance throughout.
coherence cohesion
The essay stays on topic throughout and clearly addresses the prompt.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: