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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below shows the percentage of households in owned and rented accommodation in England and Wales between 1918 and 2011.

The chart below shows the percentage of households in owned and rented accommodation in England and Wales between 1918 and 2011.
#percentage #households #accommodation #england #wales
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The bar chart illustrates
families
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 in owned and rented
houses
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percentage
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 in England and Wales from 1918 to 2011.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is clearly seen that throughout the given period, except between 2001 and 2011, the number of
families
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 owning
houses
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 decreased
while
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 the number of
families
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 renting
houses
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 increased. The period from 1918 to 1971 saw a decrease in
households
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 in owned
accommodation
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 but an increase in
households
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 in rented
accommodation
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.
Started
Wrong verb form
Starting
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 at around 76%,
families
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 living in owned
houses
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 decreased to approximately 68% in 1939
while
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 the number of
families
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 living in rented
houses
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 increased from around 22% to 32%.
Although
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 the
percentage
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 remained until 1953, they continued the
trend
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 until levelled at 50% in 1971 and switched from there. The period from 1981 to 2001 continued the same
trend
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. The
percentage
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 of
families
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 in rented
houses
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 increased to 60%
while
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 the
percentage
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 of
families
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 in owned
houses
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 decreased to 40% in 1981. The
trend
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 continued until 2001 with
households
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 in owned
accommodation
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reached
Wrong verb form
reaching
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 almost 70%
whereas
Linking Words
households
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 in owned
accommodation
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 reached almost 30%.
Nonetheless
Linking Words
, in 2011, the
trend
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 changed, with
households
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 in owned
accommodation
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increased
Wrong verb form
increasing
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 to around 35%
whereas
Linking Words
households
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 in rented
accommodation
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 decreased to around 65%
Submitted by aribawadzaki on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "whereas, while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words families, houses, percentage, households, accommodation, trend with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 4 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • ownership
  • tenancy
  • trend
  • fluctuation
  • proportion
  • residence
  • dwelling
  • shift
  • transition
  • migration
  • fluctuate
  • stabilize
  • rise
  • fall
  • increase
  • decrease
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