In many countries around the world , rural people are moving to cities ,so the population in the country side is decreasing Do you think it is a positive or a negative development

These days many
people
are migrating from small towns to the metropolitans, resulting in a decrease in population density in the towns.
Therefore
, many of us opine that
this
is a negative trend,
whereas
, other
thinks
Change the verb form
think
show examples
it is a positive trend.
However
, I found the latter viewpoint more persuasive and reasons to support my stance are elaborated in the following paragraphs.
To begin
with, those who are against
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
migration opine that migrants might feel detached from their roots. In fact, sometimes individuals become emotionally vulnerable, because of staying away from
the
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their
show examples
loved ones.
However
,
this
is not true in every case as
people
priorities
Replace the word
prioritise
show examples
employment, which they can get in the
cities
with a little ease.
On the other hand
,
people
who advocate
this
trend assert that
people
can meet basic needs by living in the
cities
. As a matter of fact, generally, metropolitans are well equipped with amenities
such
as hospitals, schools, markets etc. that can
fulfill
Change the spelling
fulfil
show examples
day-to-day needs easily. To illustrate, in
India
Add a comma
India,
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about 70 per cent of
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
prefer
Correct subject-verb agreement
prefers
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cities
, because of
well developed
Add a hyphen
well-developed
show examples
infrastructure.
Hence
, metropolitans are the first choice to live in.
Moreover
, there are ample employment opportunities in the urban areas. To elaborate, one can get employed easily,
according to
the demand of the labour market.
For example
, In Delhi, about 42 per cent of the labourers are outsiders as they get jobs of
different
Correct article usage
a different
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nature here.
Therefore
,
people
with
skill
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skills
show examples
in their hands often leave rural settlements for the
cities
.
To sum up
, undoubtedly,
human
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humans
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is
Verb problem
apply
show examples
a social
animal
Fix the agreement mistake
animals
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and it is difficult to live away from the loved ones, but, when it comes to
meeting-up
Correct your spelling
meeting up
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with the daily needs and employment
cities
are always
prefered
Correct your spelling
preferred
than
country side
Correct your spelling
countryside
show examples
by the
people
.
Submitted by mrsdns on

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task achievement
Your introduction clearly states the topic and your position, which provides a clear roadmap for the reader.
task achievement
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coherence cohesion
The essay is generally well-structured, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • urbanization
  • infrastructure
  • overcrowding
  • standard of living
  • depopulation
  • agriculture
  • traditional industries
  • educational facilities
  • healthcare facilities
  • social issues
  • community ties
  • neglect
  • spill-over effects
  • remittances
  • investments
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