Some parents give their children everything that their children ask for or allow them to do whatever they want to do. Is this good for children? What could be consequences for these children when they grow up?

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In
mordern
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modern
days,
children
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often are
recieving
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receiving
a high
level
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of
freedom
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from their
parents
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who believe that
this
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is beneficial, providing the authority to do anything they wish.
However
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, some families are opposing
such
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a method of raising
children
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, with many consequences undermined.
This
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paper will evaluate different ideas and facts, and provide suggestions on how
parents
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should raise their
children
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.
Firstly
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, having a high
level
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of
freedom
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enables
children
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to learn first-hand living experiences.
A research
Correct article usage
Research
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conducted by the University of Cambridge stated that if
parents
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imposing
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impose
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a low
level
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of control over their
children
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, it is more favourable for the
children
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becoming
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to become
show examples
independent as they turn
adult
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adults
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. Rather than giving all the solutions and advice, I believe that it is better for the
children
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themselves to explore the world and earn their own experiences.
Secondly
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, lowering unnecessary concerns and expectations over
children
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nourish
parents
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' mental health. Every
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children
Change to a singular noun
child
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are
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is
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unique with different strengths, and shortcomings, by supporting their
children
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to pursue their interests and future plans, the potential hassle and worries by
parents
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over their
children
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can be reduced as less stress and expectations driven by culture and social norms are imposed.
While
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there were many benefits for
parents
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with more
freedom
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provided to their kids, some opinions are raising alerts that
children
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would be more exposed to negative influences especially those distributed through social media.
However
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, setting up full control
to
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for
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children
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and
ban from
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banning
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all harmful aspects in their lives are not just unrealistic, but
also
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hindering
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hinder
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their ability to face these challenges independently in the future.
Instead
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,
parents
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should allow opportunities to their
children
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for trial and error, maintaining a sensitive
level
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of monitoring and
guidiances
Correct your spelling
guidance
guidances
on the other hand
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. All in all,
children
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are all individuals with free wills and will eventually become independent adults,
thus
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parents
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should provide the
freedom
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for them
make
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to make
show examples
their own choices as they are growing up.
Although
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there are some consequences to
children
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's development, these risks can be mitigated by
parents
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' close
guidiance
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guidance
and awareness.
Submitted by 788seal on

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task achievement
Work on developing a clearer and more developed argument. Some points are briefly mentioned but not fully explained.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical flow between ideas and paragraphs. Use more linking words and phrases to guide the reader through your arguments.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples and evidence to support your points. This will make your arguments more convincing and robust.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, setting the stage for the arguments and summarizing them effectively.
task achievement
The ideas presented address the task prompt adequately, covering both the potential benefits and risks of giving children too much freedom.
coherence cohesion
The overall structure of the essay is logical, with distinct paragraphs for different points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • indulgence
  • overindulgence
  • leniency
  • emotional resilience
  • rejection
  • entitlement
  • realistic expectations
  • self-regulated behavior
  • egocentric
  • financial management
  • professional relationships
  • collaboratively
  • criticism
  • appreciation
  • value
  • effort
What to do next:
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