People are consuming more and more sugar-based drinks. Why? What can be done to reduce sugary drink consumption.

#people #drinks #drink #consumption

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Presently, the

consumption

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of sugar-based

drinks

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such

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as Coca-Cola, Pepsi, and Sprite has drastically increased worldwide. There are several reasons for

this

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trend, and some solutions to reduce the

consumption

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of these

drinks

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, which will be outlined below. On the one hand, increased advertising on social media, television channels, and in urban areas encourages

people

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to see these ads more frequently, sparking their interest in trying the products.

For instance

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, Pepsi hires famous actors, athletes, and singers to promote their

drinks

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, attracting a large audience and persuading them to buy the product.

Additionally

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, the sweet artificial

flavors

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flavours

show examples

in these

drinks

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can be addictive. The chemicals in soft

drinks

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create a sensation of refreshment and relaxation.

Moreover

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, the high sugar content spikes glucose levels, temporarily energizing the body and making individuals feel more active and less stressed.

On the other hand

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, government action could significantly reduce sugary drink

consumption

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. Implementing higher taxes on these beverages could make them more expensive, discouraging

people

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from purchasing them regularly. When prices rise,

consumption

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tends to decrease sharply.

Furthermore

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, educational programs that inform citizens about the potential health risks,

such

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as liver failure, obesity, and cancer, could encourage

people

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to quit sugary

drinks

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altogether. Personally, I had a friend who was addicted to Coca-Cola, and sadly, he developed severe cancer

as a result

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Additionally

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, the government could remove vending machines that offer sugary

drinks

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and promote traditional fruit juice shops, giving

people

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healthier alternatives. In conclusion, the combination of artificial ingredients and aggressive marketing leads to higher

consumption

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of unhealthy sugary

drinks

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However

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, with government interventions,

such

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as higher taxes, the removal of vending machines, and educational campaigns, the

consumption

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of these

drinks

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can be significantly reduced.

Submitted by Witharana Senesh Rasinda Wickramasinghe on Thu Sep 26 2024

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task achievement

Consider adding one or two more specific examples or case studies to further illustrate points, such as from research or studies on sugary drink consumption.

coherence cohesion

Connecting each paragraph with transitional phrases can help the essay flow more smoothly (e.g., using 'Moreover,' 'Additionally,' or 'Furthermore').

introduction conclusion

The introduction and conclusion are clearly defined and appropriately summarize the main points discussed.

task achievement

Relevant specific examples are used to emphasize the points made, such as the mention of personal experiences and well-known brands.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

282 words

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People are consuming more and more sugar-based drinks. Why? What can be done to reduce sugary drink consumption.

Your opinion

Many governments think that economic progress is the most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Some people think that success in life comes from ard work and determination, while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Dicuss both views and give your opinion

Some people argue that if children behave badly, their parents should accept responsibility and also be punished for the behavior of their children. Do you agree or disagree with the statement?

There is an increase in the number of parents choosing educate their children themselves at home instead of sending them to schools. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?