In many countries today, if people want to find work, they have to move away from their friends and their families. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.

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Whilst others think that when

people

Use synonyms

having to move away from their

acquaintances

Use synonyms

and families to find work could have many drawbacks, I believe that the advantages of

such

Linking Words

decisions are justifiable and would outweigh the disadvantages. On the one hand, losing bonds between

acquaintances

Use synonyms

could be very detrimental to one's life. When we need help, having connections could benefit us in various circumstances.

For example

Linking Words

, In legal issues, the majority of victims who have

acquaintances

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

a sector could not only alleviate their alleged crime's punishments but

also

Linking Words

justify whatever they commit.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, the dwindling of family bonds can create a feeling of homesickness, affecting their mental stability and well-being and could result in devastating consequences.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, when exchanging the disconnection of previous

acquaintances

Use synonyms

for job opportunities,

people

Use synonyms

could widen their connections in different places. Having friends in other distant places could benefit myriad professional and interpersonal aspects.

For instance

Linking Words

, respecting

acquaintances

Use synonyms

in that place not only could help us to cope with our professional growth, and well-being, and widen our life experience but having strong bonds nationally or even internationally could help them expand their knowledge of other uniqueness in both places. If

people

Use synonyms

are inclined to preserve their old relationships rather than their own employment and futures, they would deliberately

choosing

Change the verb form

choose

be choosing

show examples

stagnation over growth In conclusion,

while

Linking Words

temporarily disconnecting oneself from past

acquaintances

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to seek employment opportunities could follow with multiple disadvantages, the advantages of adapting to the new environment for the growth of others could overshadow the former.

People

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have to chase for

further

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changes

instead

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of lingering into past connections.

bendy.anhleThu Sep 26 2024

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Task Achievement

Make sure to address all parts of the task comprehensively and include detailed arguments for both sides. For instance, provide more examples of personal experience or general knowledge where moving away for work had clear advantages.

Coherence and Cohesion

Ensure smooth transition between ideas and paragraphs. Use more cohesive devices to link your points clearly. This will help in making your essay logically structured.

Coherence and Cohesion

Work on supporting your main points with more specific examples and detailed explanations. This will strengthen the arguments you are making and provide clearer evidence to support your stance.

Coherence and Cohesion

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps to frame your arguments effectively.

Task Achievement

The main points are relevant to the topic and address both the advantages and disadvantages of moving away for work, showing a balanced view.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

269 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

relocation
employment prospects
professional development
cultural exposure
isolation
familial relationships
cost of living
career progression
mental health
significant life events
higher salaries
support families
broaden horizons
living standards

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In many countries today, if people want to find work, they have to move away from their friends and their families. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.

Some people say that computers have made life easier and more convenient. Other people say that computers have made life more complex and stressful. What is your opinion? Use specific reasons and examples to support you r answer.

With growing number of populations in cities, many people are living in small homes that don't have outdoor spaces. Is this a positive or negative development.

In many countries, childhood obesity is a growing problem. What are the reasons for this and what can individuals and governments do to tackle the problem? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Many people today find that the cost of attaining a University-level education is extremely high for the students and their families. What are the causes of this situation, and how can governments, Universities and the students themselves overcome the problem?