There is a lot of pressure on young people today to succeed academically. As a result, some people believe that non-academic subjects, such as physical education and cookery, should be removed from the school syllabus so that children can concentrate on academic work. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is argued that non-academic
school
subjects
like cookery and physical education should be excluded from the school
curriculum, because of the intense pressure which is about accomplish academically on teenagers and make them fully focus on school
work. It is totally disagreed
with that opinion because pupils can release their stress owing to Wrong verb form
disagree
that
Correct determiner usage
those
kind
of Fix the agreement mistake
kinds
subjects
and they are necessary for manintaining
their daily Correct your spelling
maintaining
life
.
On account of gradually increasing competition and difficult lessons
at school
, adolescents are under much pressure in their academic life
. Some recreational classes Fix the agreement mistake
lives
such
as cookery and physical education can contribute to mitigate
that situation and Wrong verb form
mitigating
let
off their steam. Wrong verb form
letting
Thus
, they can cope with their anxiety and become more successful at
academic Change preposition
in
subjects
. For example
, Pew
Correct article usage
the Pew
research center's
study on Correct your spelling
Research Center's
academic
achievement level of youngsters revealed that 80% of students who attend non-academic classes are more Add an article
the academic
succesfull
than others.
Correct your spelling
successful
Furthermore
, non-academic classes are included in the school
syllabus because they are crucial for preparing real
Change preposition
for real
life
. Juniors should be taught how they are able to remain
their daily Verb problem
maintain
life
by some lessons
such
as cookery and home economics. To illustrate that, SurveyMonkey.com conducted a survey in 2022 and highlighted that senior people use their knowledge about life
skills thay
they learned from their Correct your spelling
that
school
subjects
.
In conclusion, non-academic lessons
ought to be in the school
curriculum in order to provide some leisure time teenagers
to get away from their stress and responsibilities. Change preposition
for teenagers
Also
, those lessons
are necessary to improve their life
skills.Submitted by silaaltundag5 on
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task achievement
Ensure that the introduction clearly presents both sides of the argument before stating your position. This will help set up a balanced discussion.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to spelling and grammar errors. For instance, 'succesfull' should be 'successful' and 'manintaining' should be 'maintaining'.
task achievement
Try to include more varied vocabulary and complex sentence structures to show a broader range of language skills.
coherence cohesion
Improve paragraph transitions to create a smoother flow between ideas. Use transitional phrases to guide the reader.
task achievement
The essay effectively addresses the task with strong arguments supporting the importance of non-academic subjects.
task achievement
Good use of examples and data to support the main points, such as the Pew research center's study and the SurveyMonkey survey.
coherence cohesion
The essay maintains a clear and logical structure, making it easy to follow the arguments presented.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?