The table illustrates the number of people in their age groups in New Zealand between 2011 and 2012.

The table illustrates the number of people in their age groups in New Zealand between 2011 and 2012.
The provided table illustrates the distribution of
population
Add an article
the population
a population
show examples
of New Zealand by five categories based on
age
intervals from 2011 to 2012.
Overall
, it can
bee
Correct your spelling
be
show examples
seen that the number of children and young adults showed a diminishing trend,
whereas
the data for other
age
groups rose.
Additionally
, despite the downward tendency, young adults outnumbered others. Regarding all ages, there was a slight increment
by
Change preposition
of
show examples
0.6%, the population
climb
Wrong verb form
climbed
show examples
from 4,381,269 to 4,410,284.
Similary
Correct your spelling
Similarly
, individuals
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
aged 40-64, went up by 0.6 and reached
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
1,339,898 in 2012. Turning to
65
Correct article usage
the 65
show examples
age
group,
although
they were responsible for the minor of
population
Correct article usage
the population
show examples
, the figures grew modestly by 4.0%. For
under
Correct pronoun usage
those under
show examples
15, there was a downward trend, the number of children fell from 898,160 to 896,364.
Likewisely
Correct your spelling
Likewise
, the number of people who belong to
15
Correct article usage
the 15
show examples
-39
age
interval, declined by 0.2%,
however
, In spite of the fact that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
they had the highest representation among all
age
groups.
Submitted by silaaltundag5 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Vocabulary: Replace the words age with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "downward" was used 2 times.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: