some say that the most important thing abount being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#say #abount #opportunity

There is no doubt,

being

Correct word choice

that being

show examples

wealthy has become a common thing among people nowadays. Everyone is running mad rat

rase

Correct your spelling

race

show examples

behind money.

well

Capitalize word

Well

show examples

, many could be get helped by the richest guys. I agree with the statement. I shall shed light upon it by covering a lot of ground in

further

paragraphs.

Correct your spelling

show examples

begin with, for the betterment of society, a number of charity and philanthropy work could be done by an affluent person,which might

Unnecessary verb

apply

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addess

Correct your spelling

address

added

the social inequalities and assist those in need. By providing individuals the means to support educational initiatives,

contribution

Fix the agreement mistake

contributions

show examples

could be putt by

Change the article

the

show examples

richest human to create

Change the article

show examples

educatinal

Correct your spelling

educational

and skilled population in

coming

Add an article

the coming

show examples

generation. There are other different types of aspects

those

Correct pronoun usage

that

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might be improved by being wealthy.

Such

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

helth

Correct your spelling

health

, culture, sports and many more.

Moreover

, in

this

era, there is

big

Add an article

a big

show examples

need to preserve the heritage, so that upcoming children can

also

take

knowlegde

Correct your spelling

knowledge

about our ancient things and ancestors,

Remove the article

apply

show examples

work like a boon by investing in maintaining cultural and artistic goods, probably done by an opulent.

Additionally

, it is undeniable,

one's

Correct word choice

that one's

show examples

own and his family's desires are

also

depend on his shoulders, so

this

credibly the essential aspect

for

Change preposition

show examples

being rich for an individual. In conclusion, it can be said that, as being

enable

Wrong verb form

enabled

show examples

wealthy, a lot of work could be done not only for others but

also

for their own family and future

generation

Fix the agreement mistake

generations

show examples

. Eventually, putting

efforts

Fix the agreement mistake

effort

show examples

Change preposition

into

show examples

anything is much more

Correct your spelling

important

imortant

Correct your spelling

important

Submitted by amandeepkaur6581 on Tue Oct 01 2024

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task achievement

Ensure that your introduction clearly states your position on the topic. The opening statements are somewhat vague and the thesis could be clearer.

coherence cohesion

Make use of paragraphs effectively. The essay would benefit from clearer topic sentences that signal the main point of each paragraph.

task achievement

Provide more specific examples to support your points. This will make your argument stronger and more convincing.

coherence cohesion

Review basic grammar and sentence structure. There are numerous grammatical errors and awkward phrasings that hinder readability.

coherence cohesion

Use more complex sentence structures and a wider range of vocabulary to enhance your argument and make it more engaging.

task achievement

The essay attempts to address multiple dimensions of the topic, including philanthropy, education, and cultural preservation.

coherence cohesion

The conclusion ties back to the main points discussed in the body paragraphs, reinforcing the overall argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
25Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

246 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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some say that the most important thing abount being rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people think that all university student should study whatever they want. Other believe that they should only be allowed to study subject that will be useful in the future such as those related to science and technology. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Ielts Simon: Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Nowadays children are consuming too many sugar-based drinks. What are the reasons and the solutions to this situation?

You have seen a job advertisement in some newspaper. Write a letter to your friend asking him to consider this job. Please say: - Where have you seen the ad? - What is the job description? - Why do you think, he is a suitable candidate for it?

In many countries, truancy* is a serious issue for both parents and educators. •What are the causes of truancy, and what may be the effects on the child and the wider community?