the most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement

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The most important goal of
science
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should be to improve
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people
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’s
lives
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. I partly agree with
this
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statement because the development of
science
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gives
benefit
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
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for
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to
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humans but often sacrifices other creatures’
lives
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. The important aim of
science
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can probably improve humans’
lives
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since
this
Linking Words
science
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gives
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provides
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many benefits
for
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to
show examples
people
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. One of those is a tube baby program.
This
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program allows
people
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who have difficulties
to get
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getting
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a baby to get a solution by using a fertilization process
in
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apply
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out of
mother’s
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the mother’s
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belly. Many
believes
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believe
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that if
people
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strict
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are strict
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to use
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in using
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the
convensional
Correct your spelling
conventional
way, they may
wait
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wait for
show examples
the baby for a longer time or even
can
Verb problem
apply
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not have it.
This
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is because of some
healthy
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health
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issues,
such
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as the low quality of either the sperm or ovum.
Therefore
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, the aim of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
science
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to improve
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people
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’s
live
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lives
show examples
can be achieved for a good reason,
such
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as to maintain the world populacy’s growth rate.
However
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, in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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science
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’s research and development process, many
people
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often find the sacrifices of other creatures,
such
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as animals.
For example
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, the
sciencetist
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scientist
scientists
often uses
mouses
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mice
show examples
for the object of experiments before implementing them
to
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on
show examples
humans.
In
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On
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many occasions, many find that the experiment may not strictly obey the rules and
so
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is so
show examples
cruel
for
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to
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these animals. I think
,
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apply
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the
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apply
show examples
sciencetists
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scientists
should ensure the
standar
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standard
of
process
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the process
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allowed
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is allowed
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perfectly to avoid
an
Correct article usage
apply
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unethical thing making animals
suffered
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suffer
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.
Thus
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, the aim of
science
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to improve
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people
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’s
live
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lives
show examples
can be achieved without
harms
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harming
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other creatures. In
conclusion
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conclusion,
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I partly agree with the statement that the most important goal of
science
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should be to improve
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people
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’s
lives
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since the development of
science
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gives benefit for humans but often sacrifices other creatures’
lives
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by adittyafatma on

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task achievement
To improve your task response, aim to provide more comprehensive examples and specific details to support your points. This will strengthen your argument and make your essay more convincing.
coherence cohesion
To enhance coherence and cohesion, consider using a wider range of linking words and phrases to connect your ideas more smoothly. This will help the reader follow your argument more easily.
general
Pay attention to minor grammatical errors and spelling mistakes, as well as to the use of more academic vocabulary and varied sentence structures to take your writing to the next level.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which provides a good structure for your argument.
task achievement
You have addressed both sides of the argument, demonstrating the ability to consider different perspectives. This is a strong point in your task response.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • crucial role
  • technological advancements
  • medical discoveries
  • life-changing inventions
  • innovations
  • solutions to human problems
  • enhancing quality of life
  • improvement of healthcare
  • transportation
  • communication
  • agriculture
  • energy sectors
  • eradication of diseases
  • prolongation of life expectancy
  • global challenges
  • climate change
  • overpopulation
  • food security
  • developed world
  • underprivileged communities
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