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Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people believe that elderly employees are more useful to a company. While others believe that young employees are better. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

#people #employees #company
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Some
people
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 believe that older
employees
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 can give more to the
company
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 because of their experiences.
While
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 on the other side,others believe that young
employees
Use synonyms
 have a greater ability to
work
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 because of their flexibility and endurance. In
this
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 article,I will be discussing both views and give my opinion in the end.
People
Use synonyms
 who believe that older
employees
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 are more useful see that older workers have the ability to get out of difficult situations. And withstand
work
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 pressure because of their experience. They
also
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 see that the workers who have spent more time in the
company
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 know how to bring money into the
company
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 and how to benefit it.
Overall
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 ,
this
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 opinion may not make sense to many
people
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. It's very common for a lot of
people
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 as well.
On the other hand
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. Some
people
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 see that young
employees
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 can offer more to the
company
Use synonyms
 than older ones. Because the more energy, enthusiasm,and effectiveness to
work
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. And they can handle the pressure of
work
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 because their energy is usually high.
Finally
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,most
people
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 agree with
this
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 view and disagree with the other because they see it as more logical.
Overall
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,both options may be correct. But I lean more towards the first option. Because I believe that the long period of time that the workers have spent in the
company
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 gives them the necessary experience to know how to bring in the money and
work
Use synonyms
 with it.
Submitted by moh.alholimie on

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task achievement
Try to include more specific examples to support each view and your opinion. This will make your arguments stronger and more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that your points follow one another logically by using clear linking phrases. This can help in making the essay more cohesive.
coherence cohesion
The essay includes a clear introduction that sets the stage for the discussion.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion nicely summarizes the main points and provides your opinion.
task achievement
You have effectively discussed both viewpoints, providing a balanced perspective on the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Experience and knowledge
  • Company culture
  • Professional network
  • Mentoring
  • Problem-solving skills
  • Fresh perspectives
  • Adaptable
  • Innovative solutions
  • Technological advancements
  • Competitive edge
  • Energy levels
  • Drive to succeed
  • Balanced workforce
  • Synergy
  • Dynamic team
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