Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in science research, business and academic word. Others believe that some information is too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

One of the most controversial issues today relates to sharing
information
. In
this
essay, I am going to
evamine
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examine
this
question from both points of view and
then
give my own opinion on the matter. On one side of the
argument
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argument,
show examples
there are people who argue that
benefits
Correct article usage
the benefits
show examples
of open access in science exploration, business and academic
inaquiry
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inquiry
enquiry
outweigh its
disadvanages
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disadvantages
. The main reason for believing
this
is that sharing
information
can accelerate innovation and development
accross
Correct your spelling
across
various fields,
such
as open access to scientific research promotes transparency, collaboration and more rapid advancements.
It
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It is
It was
show examples
also
possible to say that in business, sharing
information
can lead to better industry
standarts
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standards
, improved products and
enhances
Wrong verb form
enhanced
show examples
customer services. In academia, freely shared
informaton
Correct your spelling
information
increases
knowlegde
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knowledge
accessibility,
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and facilatates
show examples
facilatates
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facilitates
global
learninng
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learning
.
However
, it should not be forgotten,
it
Correct word choice
that it
show examples
is
also
possible to make
opposing
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an opposing
show examples
case. It is often argued that in fact some
information
is proprietary and accessing it could
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
lead to
loss
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a loss
show examples
of
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competitive
competetive
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competitive
advantage
Change the noun form
advantages
show examples
, like trade secrets, which are crucial for success
Submitted by aziza89 on

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coherence cohesion
Try to ensure all sections of your essay have a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. This will improve the overall cohesion.
task achievement
Include specific examples to strengthen your points. This helps the reader understand and engage with your argument.
task achievement
Focus on addressing all aspects of the question fully to achieve a complete response.
task achievement
Your essay presents both sides of the argument effectively, which shows a balanced assessment of the issue.
coherence cohesion
You effectively identify the benefits of sharing information and the potential drawbacks, showing a nuanced understanding.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Open access
  • Innovation
  • Collaboration
  • Proprietary information
  • Competitive advantage
  • Trade secrets
  • Transparency
  • Ethical risks
  • Plagiarism
  • Attribution
  • Security risks
  • Global learning
What to do next:
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