IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people think that the government should establish free libraries in each town. Others believe it is a waste of money since people can access the internet at home to obtain information. Discuss both the side and give your opinion.

#people #government #libraries #town #waste #money #access #internet #home #information #side
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These days, every
time
 you turn on the TV or flick through the pages of a newspaper, you see the news about
construction
Add an article
the construction
show examples
 of
libraries
 . The question
arise
Change the verb form
arises
show examples
 in our mind, how can it
facilitates
Change the verb form
facilitate
show examples
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
 and what is the
ulternative
Correct your spelling
alternative
 source? Many individuals think that establishing new
libraries
 is
Correct article usage
a wastage
show examples
wastage
Replace the word
waste
show examples
 of money because they have
Correct article usage
an ulternative
show examples
ulternative
Correct your spelling
alternative
 source in
form
Correct article usage
the form
show examples
 of the
internet
 which is free and
accessable
Correct your spelling
accessible
. I completely agree with the ideas and will support my opinion in
this
 essay with examples. Commencing the first idea, it has been assumed by many people, that the authorities should make
library
Correct article usage
the library
show examples
 free for the public in every town.
Library
Add an article
The library
show examples
 is considered a hub of knowledge and getting free access to it will make it easier for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people to retain knowledge. One can
gets
Change the verb form
get
show examples
 an old book in hard from, as old
book
Fix the agreement mistake
books
show examples
 are rare to find.
Also
, they will be able to get the
guide line
Correct your spelling
guideline
show examples
 related to the book
by
Change preposition
from
show examples
 the librarian which will help them in many ways.
Besides
, studying there, they will be able to
interect
Correct your spelling
interact
 with people and share their thoughts on different topics.
Lets
Replace the word
Let's
Let us
show examples
 take the example of my University
time
, when I was assigned a presentation on the poetry of Robert
herric
Change the capitalization
Herric
show examples
, at first it was hard for me to find related
information
 about my topic
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 because the
books
 that I was told by my lecturer
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 of some old publishers, which were rare to find anywhere, but rushing to the library and a bit discussion with the librarian, made it easier for me to get
books
 that contain the
information
 of my topic.
Moreover
, it is the fact of the day that the
internet
 has replaced
libararies
Correct your spelling
libraries
. Many individuals
thinks
Change the verb form
think
show examples
 that the government should not waste money on building new
libraries
 because
books
 are available in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
printed form on the
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
.
However
, the
internet
 has created an ease
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 the students and teachers. They can easily obtain
information
 by
downloding
Correct your spelling
downloading
books
 anytime, anywhere from the
internet
. Even the
information
 about different topics, is
also
 available there, which saves the
time
 of the readers.
For instance
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
university students and teachers are making full use of
Correct article usage
the interent
show examples
interent
Correct your spelling
Internet
While
 sitting in their
class rooms
Correct your spelling
classrooms
show examples
 they prefer to search
books
Change preposition
for books
show examples
 and
topic
Fix the agreement mistake
topics
show examples
 on the
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
 and get their desired
information
 because they find it hard to visit
libraries
 and waste
time
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
searching
books
Change preposition
for books
show examples
 there.
Hence
, it is proven from the above arguments that no doubt
libraries
 are
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 useful
mean
Fix the agreement mistake
means
show examples
 of
information
 and access to it should be free for the public, but with growing
time
every
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
thing
Correct your spelling
everything
show examples
 has an
ulternative
Correct your spelling
alternative
 solution. As, in the modern world the
internet
 has replaced
libraries
 because it not only contains
books
 in soft form
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 but
also
 provides related
information
 on different topics, which is of great help
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
teachers and students.
Submitted by hadiyanasir73 on

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task response
Ensure clarity by using simpler sentence structures and checking for grammar inaccuracies. For example, "can gets an old book in hard from" should be corrected to "can get an old book in hard form".
task response
Try to stay balanced in your discussion by explaining both perspectives in a more detailed and even manner. Expanding on why some might oppose libraries aside from the internet being an alternative could create a more well-rounded argument.
coherence cohesion
Improve logical flow by clearly linking your examples to the points they support. Some examples, like discussing university research, should clearly tie back to your main argument about libraries and access to knowledge.
task response
Good attempt at explaining the pros and cons of both libraries and the internet with relevant personal examples.
coherence cohesion
Clear introduction and conclusion that present the main argument effectively.
task response
Engages with the topic by providing practical examples from personal experience, which enhances the discussion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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