In many countries people have to pay for medical care, but some think that it should be a free service provided by the government. Do you agree or disagree?
With the development of medicine, it is argued by
people
wether
medical Correct your spelling
whether
care
has to be costed or invested by the government
, making it free for public
. If medical Add an article
the public
centers
serve Change the spelling
centres
people
without any charge, it may encourage every individual to live healthy
, l believe that payment has to be imposed for everybody to stay alert and strong during Change the adjective
healthily
health
issues to balance budget
effectively for other realms.
On the one hand, if the Correct article usage
the budget
government
open
doors of free Wrong verb form
opens
health
care
centers
for Change the spelling
centres
people
, they may lead many
opportunities, which can support Change preposition
to many
people
to directs
their earnings to other necessities, Change the verb form
direct
such
as education, personal needs and future dreams. As a result
, they can avoid potential troubles, which may require a lot of fundings
.
Fix the agreement mistake
funding
However
, on the other hand
, l strongly contend that payment for meditations is highly significant for both the government
and people
in many cases. Firstly
, if the government
continues to separate
more budget on Verb problem
spend
this
sphere, it may cause to
face Verb problem
apply
with
Change preposition
apply
financial
Add an article
the financial
crisis
Fix the agreement mistake
crises
due to
expensive medical drugs, tools and service
. As long as it has monetary value, every person Fix the agreement mistake
services
try
to take Change the verb form
tries
care
of their health
, avoiding bad habits in order not to waste money on medical things. As a result
of this
government
can distribute money effectively on
Change preposition
to
another staffs
. Fix the agreement mistake
other staff
Secondly
, free service often leads Change preposition
to unappropriate
unappropriate
daily Correct your spelling
inappropriate
routine
, affecting negatively Fix the agreement mistake
routines
to
the human body Change preposition
apply
due to
poor attention on
Change preposition
to
health
. Eventually, the amount of money donated in
hospitals for free may cause to be garbage more and more because of its cost. Change preposition
to
Therefore
, payment should be required to use them wisely and stop them to engage
in unhealthy habits.
In conclusion, Change preposition
from engaging
although
free medical care
is important to improve the overall
health
of people
, l believe that hospitals must get monetary benefits from people
to rise
the amount of the Correct your spelling
raise
government
budget and urge people
to take care
of themselves.Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on
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task response
Clarify your position in the introduction and ensure it is consistently supported throughout the essay.
task response
Use more specific examples to illustrate your points, which will strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical flow between paragraphs to ensure coherence. Transitional phrases or linking words can help achieve this.
coherence cohesion
Work on varying sentence structures to enhance readability.
task response
The essay addresses both sides of the argument, which demonstrates balance in your writing.
coherence cohesion
You successfully included both an introduction and a conclusion, providing a clear framework for your essay.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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