The bar charts show the percentage of people who ate five portions of fruit and vegetables per day in the UK from 2001 to 2008.

The bar charts show the percentage of people who ate five portions of fruit and vegetables per day in the UK from 2001 to 2008.
The bar graph
illustrate
Change the verb form
illustrates
show examples
the number of
individual
Change to a plural noun
individuals
show examples
who ate five portions of
fruit
and vegetables each day in the UK over the period of 2001 to 2008.
Overall
,
I
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
can be seen that
percentage
Correct article usage
the percentage
show examples
of
womens
Correct your spelling
women
show examples
who ate
fruit
and
vegetable
Fix the agreement mistake
vegetables
show examples
was always higher as
compare
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
with
mens
Correct your spelling
men
show examples
and children.
To begin
with, around 35% of women ate five
portion
Change to a plural noun
portions
show examples
of
fruit
and vegetables per day in 2005, and more
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
20% in 2001. Gradually
this
trend
increasing
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
over
period
Add an article
a period
the period
show examples
of 2001 to 2005, and
then
stable at 30% in 2008.
Whereas
, In
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
similar trend was observed starting from more
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
15% in 2001, and the peak at around 25% in 2005 and
remain
Wrong verb form
remained
show examples
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
for
rest
Correct article usage
the rest
show examples
of the year.
On the other hand
,
approx
Replace the word
approximately
show examples
12% of children
are eating
Wrong verb form
ate
show examples
fruit
of
Correct your spelling
or
show examples
vegetable
Fix the agreement mistake
vegetables
show examples
daily from 2001 to 2003.
And
Correct your spelling
An
show examples
increase in trend was observed after 2003, which
peak
Change the form of the verb
peaked
show examples
at 25% in 2007.
Submitted by merujain2221 on

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words fruit with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Portions
  • Consumption
  • Demographic breakdown
  • Public health
  • Trend
  • Bar chart
  • Notable peaks and falls
  • Implications
  • Public awareness
  • Health outcomes
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