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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Many organization and companies ask their staff to wear a uniform. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this? What kind of jobs should have a work uniform?

#organization #companies #staff #uniform #jobs #work
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These days, the rules of
work
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 in the various companies are different from each other.
For instance
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, in a group of industries, the
fact
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that is
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 really important is wearing the
uniform
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.
while
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 wearing special
clothes
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 for
work
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 has some demerits, I still believe that cannot overshadow the benefits of some essential works that have special protocols. On the
one
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 hand, the merits of wearing a
uniform
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 are varied.
Firstly
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, if you have to wear
work
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clothes
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 to
work
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, you do not spend a lot of time and money to go to
work
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; in
fact
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, you do not need to buy several
clothes
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 for
work
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, and you have
one
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 choice, so the time for selecting customs become less.
Secondly
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, When the variety of
clothes
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 in offices becomes less, the employees can focus on the
work
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 better;
besides
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, they do not think about the items that co-workers use.
Thirdly
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, it is crucial to wear a
uniform
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 for special workplaces on account of the
fact
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 that wearing these
clothes
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 aids employees to become safer like refineries, the people who
work
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 at nuclear plants, and so forth. To illustrate, when you wear
clothes
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 that material is plastic you will be burnt in the refinery evidence or when the temperature is high.
On the other hand
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,
this
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 kind of particular
clothes
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 for
work
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 have some drawbacks. On the
one
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 side, you cannot go out with not only friends but
also
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 family after
work
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 inasmuch as your
clothes
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 are not good for the other places other than your job area. On the other side, most of the population has
one
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uniform
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;
hence
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, when their costumes become dirty, they do not have any other options except washing them immediately.
To sum up
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, wearing uniforms has a range of advantages that can eclipse the bad points
due to
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 the
fact
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 that it helps us to not invest our time and money in
clothes
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, and it helps us to be accurate and protect us from bad phenomena
Submitted by maryamkazemi968 on

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task achievement
Try to present the disadvantages more comprehensively and provide a more balanced discussion, given the essay's main focus on uniforms' advantages. Expand on examples and deepen the analysis of the negative aspects to ensure a more complete task response.
coherence cohesion
Review the use of connectors to enhance cohesiveness. Some ideas lack smooth transitions, which could confuse the reader. Make sure each paragraph flows logically to reinforce your argumentation.
task achievement
The essay effectively presents both advantages and disadvantages of wearing uniforms, meeting the task requirement.
coherence cohesion
The essay concludes effectively, recapping the main idea, which helps in reinforcing the argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • equality
  • socio-economic disparities
  • professional image
  • brand recognition
  • restrict individual expression
  • customer-facing industries
  • job satisfaction
  • financial burden
  • creativity
  • self-expression
  • identifiable
  • professional appearance
  • sense of belonging
  • corporate identity
What to do next:
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