Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

A student is enrolled in the university in order to get the specific degree to earn
there
Replace the word
their
show examples
livelihood in future that
demand
Change the verb form
demands
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
certain level of input during the term time. Some students think that they should learn other
courses
while
on
contrary
Correct article usage
the contrary
show examples
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
that
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
want to stay focused on their main
courses
.
This
essay will discuss both sides
how
Correct word choice
and how
show examples
much other
subjects
are important to achieve the desired goal.
Firstly
learning the extra subject is as important as the major
courses
It enables the students to enhance their expertise significantly .
For instance
, Engineering universities should teach project management skills
in addition
to the core
subjects
because project management is an essential part of an engineer’s life.
Similarly
, Medical colleges should help
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
students to learn mathematics to develop
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
understanding of graphs and data that would help a medical student to enhance their analysis skills by looking at the mathematical histories of patients.
Hence
,other
subjects
are equally important for
sake
Correct article usage
the sake
show examples
of growth in every
spare
Correct your spelling
sphere
show examples
of life. Moving forward, there is an other Group of student who believes on the perfection rather than the diversity. They argue that you should add value
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
yourself by staying focused to
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
degree rather than diversifying your attention to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
multiple things.
For
example
Add a comma
example,
show examples
software engineers studying
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
programming should learn
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
development. Engaging themselves
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
other subject
Change the wording
another subject
other subjects
show examples
can make them less attentive which in turn would
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
their language learning skills.
Other
Change the wording
Another
show examples
heated argument is that
more
Correct article usage
the more
show examples
deeply you dive
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
single
Add an article
the single
a single
show examples
subject more you
would
Wrong verb form
will
show examples
learn. If someone is working on the
programing
Correct your spelling
programming
show examples
he should increase their knowledge of programming by giving all their effort to different programming languages.
Overall
, considering both views
other
Change preposition
on other
show examples
subjects
impacts the
experitise
Correct your spelling
experience
significantly .Engineers and Doctors must be taught
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
addition
Replace the word
additional
show examples
courses
to improve them in
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
respective areas.It
develop
Change the verb form
develops
show examples
the skill to learn step by step irrespective of the syllabus they have studied or trained
because
Change preposition
in because
show examples
professionalism is all about
to tackle
Change the verb form
tackling
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
challenges.
Submitted by shehzadarshad976 on

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task response
To improve your task response score, ensure that the examples you give are more closely tied and specific to your arguments. Highlight real-world cases or studies where various universities have successfully implemented additional courses that benefited students. This will make your examples more relevant and strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
For better coherence and cohesion, try to use more linking words and phrases to smoothly transition between ideas. This helps guide the reader through your essay logically and clearly.
introduction conclusion
The essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing the discussion and summarizing the main points.
logical structure
You have presented both sides of the argument logically with valid reasons, which shows good understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Broaden
  • Perspectives
  • Specialize
  • Critical thinking
  • Problem-solving skills
  • Career success
  • Interdisciplinary connections
  • Structured path
  • Clear goals
  • Creativity
  • Innovation
  • Academic credibility
  • Recognition
  • Balance
  • Exploring
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