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Band 6

In many countries people have to pay for medical care, but some think that it should be a free service provided by the government. To what extend Do you agree or disagree?

#countries #people #care #think #service #government
Medical
services
 should be provided completely free by the authorities.
Although
this
 may be helpful for low-income
families
, I believe that people should take personal responsibility for paying for their medical care, despite
government
 contributions. The payment for medical care should be covered by individuals, as they are primarily responsible for their own medical conditions rather than the authorities. There are
also
 more significant factors,
such
 as military
services
 and the education system, which should be prioritized by the
government
.
In addition
, the
government
's budget may not be sufficient to cover everyone's healthcare, especially when medical equipment is so high-priced.
As a result
, it is advisable for individuals to cover their own medical expenses
instead
 of relying on the authorities.
On the other hand
, most people are unable to afford these crucial medical
services
due to
 low income or because they are retired. With
government
 support, they will be able to utilize essential healthcare
services
 for free. For many low-income
families
, medical
services
 remain prohibitively expensive.
Additionally
,
government
 assistance may provide them with free
services
, allowing them to access care without financial burden.
Therefore
, free medical
services
 will be essential for some middle-income
families
. In conclusion,
while
 free
services
 provided by the
government
 will be helpful for low-income
families
, I believe that if service users take more responsibility for their healthcare and cover their medical expenses, the
government
 will be able to focus and allocate funds to other vital sectors.
Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on

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task achievement
Consider incorporating more specific examples to support your arguments. This will strengthen your position and demonstrate a more comprehensive understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next to enhance the overall flow of the essay.
coherence cohesion
The essay is well-organized with a clear introduction and conclusion that summarize your stance effectively.
task achievement
The topic is addressed thoroughly with balanced perspectives, showing a good understanding of the task.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • universal coverage
  • equity
  • fundamental human right
  • out-of-pocket expenses
  • financial hardship
  • preventative measures
  • social contract
  • quality of care
  • high demand
  • limited resources
  • tax implications
  • budget priorities
  • universal healthcare systems
  • public health
  • disease burden
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