It has been observed that in many countries notenoughstudentsarechoosingto studyscience subjects at university. What do you think are the causes of the problem? What are the effects on society

In various nations, there is a lack of pupils choosing to study
science
subjects at a tertiary level. In
this
essay, I will be discussing the contributions to
this
problem and how
this
choice made by
students
is affecting
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society.
Firstly
, I think that poor quality of teaching at a secondary school is the main factor
of
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behind
show examples
the decision being made by learners to not study
science
courses at
unversity
Correct your spelling
university
.
Students
tend to select and
aquire
Correct your spelling
acquire
more knowledge
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
classes that they excel in,
therefore
, insufficient understanding
on
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of
show examples
the subject would make pupils feel that they are not good enough to meet the requirements set by certain
instituitions
Correct your spelling
institutions
.
For example
, university applications are very competitive and if a pupil already feels that they are not up to standard in terms of knowledge, in comparison to their peers, they may feel pressured into choosing another course that they have a better chance of being accepted into.
Furthermore
,
this
decision made by
students
may have negative impacts on society. With fewer
students
studying
science
subjects, jobs in industries that require
this
knowlegde
Correct your spelling
knowledge
will eventually cease to exist.
This
not only impacts the general public, but the economy as well because a decrease in the number of employees working in organisations that require
science
lead
Correct subject-verb agreement
leads
show examples
to a depletion in profits. 
Moreover
, a reduction in profits is unpleasant for businesses as they will not be able to pay rent and cover costs, resulting in closure.  In conclusion, there are fewer
students
who view
science
as a subject option in university
due to
a weak foundation in
understanding
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the understanding
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of
this
field
as well as
the increase in competitiveness for applying to tertiary
instituitions
Correct your spelling
institutions
.
This
choice made by
students
affects the nation negatively
due to
a decrease in job opportunities and the
diminshing
Correct your spelling
diminishing
of businesses.
Submitted by d.adeliasong on

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task achievement
Consider including more specific examples or case studies to strengthen the argument. This will make the discussion more tangible and relatable for the reader.
coherence cohesion
Enhance logical progression by using transition words effectively. This will improve the flow from one idea to the next.
introduction conclusion present
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which effectively frame the discussion.
task achievement
You provide a good analysis of the causes of the issue by addressing the quality of teaching and its impact on students' choices.
logical structure
The paragraphs are organized, with each focusing on a specific point, aiding in logical structure.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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