The two pie charts show the percentage of pollutants entering a particular part of ocean in 1997 and 2007. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The two pie charts show the percentage of pollutants entering a particular part of

ocean in 1997 and 2007. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the

main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The pie charts compare data about the percentage of
ocean
pollutants between 1997 and 2007 from different sources
such
as Air , farm
waste
, industrial
waste
, domestic sewage , offshore oil and marine.
Overall
, it is important that air pollution is the major factor for our
ocean
so far
while
reduced by %1 in 2007 only ; second , sewage rose modestly more than %40 in 10 years which gives us a red alert for our water quality in the near future; another notable point that litter was 0 impact for the
ocean
in 2007 when it was %4 in 1997;
moreover
, Offshore oil were increased by almost 3x and reach to the peak by %14;
on the other hand
, the industrial
waste
has been decreased more than twice within 10 years and get the lowest percentage at 9 ;
similarly
, marine
also
was less effect in 2007 compare to 1970 by %5. In conclusion, by
summing
Replace the word
sum
show examples
up these points air pollution and sewage were the main reasons for
ocean
pollutants and our earth
while
farm
waste
, litter , and marine had less impact in 2007 which is great news for our
ocean
.
Submitted by no123fm on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words ocean, waste with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "compare" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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