Some people prefer to be self-employed, whereas others like working for companies or institutions. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of both approaches. Which do you think is a better approach?
Money is the primary source behind any business whether it is one's own or a person works under others. there are two contrasting beliefs as one group
believe
in working for once Correct subject-verb agreement
believes
while
opposition
gives priority to Correct article usage
the opposition
do
a job for the company. Both Wrong verb form
doing
married
and marriage will be discussed, followed by Replace the word
marriage
reasoned
conclusion.
On the one hand, freedom of decision is Add an article
a reasoned
importance
for any self-employed person as they are Replace the word
important
self reliant
, and are able to do whatever they love or have Add a hyphen
self-reliant
ability
to change the seasons, Correct article usage
the ability
according to
their personal perspectives. Consequently
, all the processes can go in an
autonomy without any sort of interference or dependency on others. Remove the article
apply
Moreover
, working for oneself,
Remove the comma
apply
also
brings prosperous
for the person as Replace the word
prosperity
owner
of the brand is Add an article
the owner
only
heir of substantial earnings. Add an article
the only
this
potentially hired incomes are the sort of accomplishments for endeavours and dedication for many office workers. Change the determiner
these
Besides
, independent businessman, do not receive majority
of government benefits, related to medical, pension, schemes or paid leaves, which can add to their financial burdens. Add an article
the majority
a majority
Thus
, financial concentrates are the
major concern for employers.
Correct article usage
a
On the other hand
, corporate employees has
minimal risk of unpredictable or irregular Change the verb form
have
wage
as their monthly payments would not be affected by bad circumstances of Fix the agreement mistake
wages
company
as they will get Add an article
the company
a company
fixed
amount for their work. Correct article usage
a fixed
Furthermore
, members of the staff has
Change the verb form
have
fixed
working time of Correct article usage
a fixed
approximate
eight hours and Change the word
approximately
afterwards
they will be free to enjoy their personal life with loved ones. But, Add a comma
afterwards,
in contrast
to honors
, it is Change the spelling
honours
same
as employees Correct article usage
the same
spend
their free time with thoughts to flourish their brand in the market. Even more, if Wrong verb form
spending
boss
is Add an article
the boss
a boss
at
Change preposition
on
holidays
, even Fix the agreement mistake
holiday
then
he or she would get call
from Add an article
a call
office
staff. Add an article
the office
Therefore
, include travel with the independent organization holders.
Overall
, I personally believe that, regardless of honour or corporate being
Unnecessary verb
apply
honest
is the primary demand of every work and no doubt, successful business honours are gratified, but it can be Replace the word
honesty
also
challenging as it is not worth it to embark in
our new market share with huge investment without any sort of experience. Change preposition
on
Thus
, appropriate training or learning from past job experience has
key importance to Verb problem
is of
boost
earnings in Wrong verb form
boosting
a
independent work.Remove the article
apply
Submitted by sarabjeetk8899 on
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Grammar
Work on improving grammatical accuracy and sentence structure to make your ideas and arguments clearer to the reader.
Examples
Include more specific examples to support the main points. This will help make your arguments more compelling and relatable.
Structure
Try expanding the introduction and conclusion to better frame your discussion and provide a more comprehensive overview of your arguments.
Content
The essay presents relevant ideas on the advantages and disadvantages of self-employment and working for companies.
Comparison
A distinction is made between the perspectives of those who prefer self-employment versus those who value job security.
Conclusion
The conclusion ties back to the main discussion, offering a personal viewpoint and a balanced view on the topic.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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