IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The map below describes changes to a park in 1980 and now. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The map below describes changes to a park in 1980 and now. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The
two
Use synonyms
 maps compare the changes in the layout of a park in 1980 and today. In overview, much entertainment has been added to the park, and flower fields have
also
Linking Words
 been removed at present. In 1980, there were trees that took up the upper right corner of the land, and
next,
Linking Words
there were a large number of
flowers
Use synonyms
 below the wood. Concerning the left side, a pond and three benches around, plus a small area to the south of the pond was used for planting
flowers
Use synonyms
.
Additionally
Linking Words
, there were
two
Use synonyms
 gates, one was situated between
two
Use synonyms
 fields of
flowers
Use synonyms
, and another was erected on the left side and beyond the water. Nowadays, the landscape of the green space has been reshaped.
First,
Linking Words
Two
Use synonyms
 doors were dismantled, and
flowers
Use synonyms
 were replaced by the bush in the lower left corner
as well as
Linking Words
 the playground in the lower right corner.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the land of the original grove on the right side has been shrunk, and some parts were repurposed as a picnic place.
Therefore
Linking Words
, there are chairs, and desks for the public to come to the barbecue.
Finally
Linking Words
, one more chair was placed around the pond.

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words two, flowers with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "changes" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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