A company has announced that it wishes to build a large factory near your community. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this new influence on your community. Do you support or oppose the factory? Explain your position.

It is a common belief that generally big factories make several types of pollutants which bring negative impact to society so should avoid to build it close to my area.
In contrast
, Some
peoples
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people
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think that the huge
factory
creates positive results in
economy
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the economy
an economy
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which
allow
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allows
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to overcome other negative aspects. there is no
difinitive
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definitive
right or wrong answer, but I find the latter argument more persuasive. On the one hand, It is true that a
factory
make
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makes
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lots of pollutants,
such
as noise, air pollutants, waste and contaminated water. These are likely to impact
to
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apply
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local residents's health.
For example
,
some times
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sometimes
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, the by-produced rubbishes sneak into the
canel
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canal
, and contaminate the water,
This
cause
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causes
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the
reduce
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reduction
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the local food sources,
fishes
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fish
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. crabs and water, and ruin their communities.
On the other hand
, It is evident that once a large
factory
is established, It
contribute
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contributes
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the
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to the
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growth of
local
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the local
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economy.
Due to the
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The
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large
factory
not only
creats
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creates
the
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apply
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local occupation
opportunity
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opportunities
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but
also
brings other workers from other regions.
This
are
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is
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likely
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to creats
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creats
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creates
create
more income
to
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for
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local businesses, as the commuting
labors
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labourers
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spend money in
this
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apply
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local
store
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stores
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such
as restaurants, and cafes. In conclusion, Even though the question of
establishig
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establishing
a large
manufacuring
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manufacturing
building near my residence can be controversial as there are both cons and pros. It is apparent that the
factory
generates many
evnironmental
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environmental
inconvenience
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inconveniences
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.
Nevertheless
, I personally believe that there are more positive outcomes to
build
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building
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a big organization near my
residece
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residence
such
as
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the opportunity
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opportunity
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opportunities
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of
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for
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jobs and growth of local markets
Submitted by yhj000801 on

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task achievement
Your essay presents a clear argument, but it can be beneficial to articulate your points more explicitly. Be sure to link each advantage and disadvantage directly to your final position for better task achievement.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph logically flows from one point to the next. You might consider using more linking words and phrases to improve overall coherence and cohesion.
task achievement
You should clarify some of your points with more detailed and relevant examples that clearly illustrate your perspective.
language use
Review some English language rules, as there are grammatical errors that slightly affect the clarity of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Your essay includes an introduction and conclusion, framing the discussion well, which contributes positively to cohesion.
task achievement
Despite some inaccuracies, you've addressed both sides of the argument, which is fundamental for a balanced response.
coherence cohesion
You've made a clear attempt to weigh advantages against disadvantages, demonstrating good organizational skills.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • economic growth
  • infrastructure development
  • local businesses
  • unemployment rates
  • pollution
  • residents' health
  • noise and traffic congestion
  • social tensions
  • community dynamics
  • boost the local economy
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