In many countries, women are allowed to take maternity leave from their jobs during the first year after the birth of their baby. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?
One-year maternity leave is implemented in numerous countries as of
birthgiving
. Correct your spelling
birth
Although
such
a long period of abscence
impairs Correct your spelling
absence
workforce
, taking Correct article usage
the workforce
care
of newborns by mothers is vital. From my perspective, infant care
is fairly more significant than the
manpower, since the loss of manpower can be tolerated.
Over the course of Correct article usage
apply
Correct article usage
a 15-years
15-years
span, the proportion of women in Correct your spelling
15-year
worklife
has increased dramatically. Correct your spelling
work life
While
this
ratio was scarcely more than 20 per cent previously, nowadays, the number of male and female employees is nearly equalized. In this
context, pregnancy has increased its importance. Due to
the requirement that
at least one year of meticulous childcare, companies face hardships related to Change preposition
of
lack
of staff. Correlated to the scale of companies, challenges are likely to be bigger. Consider a restaurant which operates with Correct article usage
a lack
five-people
staff. The Correct word choice
five-person
abscence
of one of themCorrect your spelling
absence
,
hardens that establishment's workflow.
A newborn, Remove the comma
apply
however
, constanly
needs meticulous Correct your spelling
constantly
care
. This
utterly important responsibility must be carried out by mother
with utmost sensitivity. There are challenging tasks that must be done punctually, Correct article usage
the mother
such
as following short sleeping period
, Fix the agreement mistake
periods
brestfeeding
and diapering. As Correct your spelling
breastfeeding
baby
needs to be taken Correct article usage
a baby
care
of most in one-year
period, fulfilling these requirements is of paramount importance to parentship. Add an article
a one-year
Furthermore
, the relationship between mother and baby begins in infancy. This
is also
fairly
significant reality that must not be ignored, in order to cultivate healthy generations. Add an article
the fairly
a fairly
Consequently
, employers may find a replacement for missing staff; yet, babies cannot do the same for their mothers.
In conclusion, it is a fact that the
birth leave leads to Correct article usage
apply
decrement
in Add an article
a decrement
workforce
; Add an article
the workforce
however
, early childcare can be carried out by non
other than Correct your spelling
none
mother
herself. Correct article usage
the mother
For
this
reason, the maternity leave is more beneficial.Submitted by TUTOO on
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task achievement
To enhance task achievement, consider providing more specific examples or data to support your points.
clarity
Clarify your argument regarding how the absence of manpower 'can be tolerated' with clearer logic and examples.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure all sections of your essay provide a seamless flow of ideas, linking each point more cohesively.
organization
Your essay has a clear structure with a strong introduction and conclusion, outlining the main argument effectively.
content quality
The relationship between the mother and baby and its long-term importance is well-articulated, emphasizing the need for maternity leave.
vocabulary
The use of some advanced vocabulary and phrases strengthens the quality of your writing.
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