Some people say that that working at home is beneficial to the worker and the family while others believe that it is stressful to both the worker and the family. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that employees and their families are getting benefits from working from
home
scheme.
However
, others argue that it can cause
work related
Add a hyphen
work-related
show examples
stress
for both parties.
This
essay elaborates
the
Change preposition
on the
show examples
two sides and I agree with the former since its benefits outweigh the latter. On the one hand,
working from
Add a hyphen
working-from-home
show examples
home
schemes are often designed to have flexible working hours which gives the
workers
freedom
Add an article
the freedom
show examples
to choose when to finish their
job
so they can do other tasks
such
as doing house chores.
Furthermore
, there is no need to commute to
workplace
Add an article
the workplace
show examples
and
this
significantly reduces the
stress
of the
workers
.
For instance
, some companies in Indonesia let their employees decide whether they want to
work
at the office or at
home
for a day every week to reduce the mental
stress
of the
workers
.
Therefore
, working from
home
is proven to be advantageous for the
workers
to prevent them from getting overwhelmed at
work
.
On the other hand
,
this
scheme can
also
bring some potential drawbacks
such
as getting disturbed by a family member
while
working which can lead to losing focus.
Moreover
, for an outgoing and sociable individual, working from
home
might cause
stress
since interaction only happens with family and only little conversation
made
Add a missing verb
is made
show examples
with other
workers
.
For example
, an
acquintance
Correct your spelling
acquaintance
of mine who had a remote
job
with healthy working hours and
good
Correct article usage
a good
show examples
salary left his
job
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
full-time onsite
work
as he preferred a
job
that
allows
Wrong verb form
allowed
show examples
him to socialize with other people.
Therefore
, working from
home
is not suitable for
workers
who are extroverted.
However
,
this
also
means that a less sociable person
suits
Wrong verb form
is suited to
show examples
working at
home
since interaction between
workers
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
not mandatory. In conclusion,
although
people perceive that working from
home
is stressful for both
workers
and families, I strongly believe that it offers more advantages for the
workers
since it provides flexibility and
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
reduces
stress
from commuting and socializing
Submitted by ameliahanakaru01 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement
Make sure to clearly state your opinion and ensure it is reflected throughout your essay. Although your conclusion mentions your stance, integrating it consistently into the body paragraphs would make your argument clearer.
Coherence and Cohesion
Try using transition words such as 'however', 'moreover', and 'therefore' more strategically to connect ideas within paragraphs and improve overall flow.
Task Achievement
The essay presents both views effectively and provides relevant examples to support each point. This strengthens the argument and shows a balanced discussion of the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion
There is a logical structure with an introduction, body paragraphs discussing both sides of the argument, and a conclusion. This helps the reader follow your line of reasoning.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Remote work
  • Telecommuting
  • Work-life balance
  • Productivity
  • Flexibility
  • Isolation
  • Distractions
  • Customized work environment
  • Work encroachment
  • Communication challenges
  • Family bonds
  • Traditional workplace
  • Time management
  • Personalized workspace
What to do next:
Look at other essays: