IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The chart gives employment and education statistics for eight European countries in 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

The chart gives employment and education statistics for eight European countries in 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.
#employment #education #statistics #eight #european #countries #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The chart illustrates the proportion of
people
 with college degrees and the employment rate with annual income in eight European
countries
 in 2015.
Overall
,
Norway
 had the highest yearly average salaries with almost 41500
while
 Bulgaria had the lowest with exactly 3332, respectively.
Moreover
,
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
 had the second
high
Correct word choice
highest
show examples
 annual income after
Norway
 with approximately 41500. In regard to citizens who work,
Norway
,
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
 and Austria seemed to
be
Verb problem
have
show examples
 the highest
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
employment
rate
Fix the agreement mistake
rates
show examples
 with 74.8% , 72,7% and 71.1% .
On the contrary
, Greece is the lowest country in Europe with properly 50% of the
people
work
Wrong verb form
working
show examples
 there.
According to
 the
countries
 with university education,
Norway
 ,
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
 and Luxembourg are the most
countries
 with
proportion
Fix the agreement mistake
proportions
show examples
 43.2%,41,6% and 41.1%
while
 Portugal is the
least
Correct word choice
lowest
show examples
 percentage in
people
 education with only 22.9%. In general,
countries
 which had the highest numbers of
people
 with college degrees are the most paid in average income.
Submitted by 361109698 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words people, countries, norway with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
▼

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Employment rate
  • Higher education attainment
  • Correlation
  • Trends
  • Patterns
  • Outliers
  • Economic factors
  • Cultural influences
  • Policy implications
  • Gender differences
  • Youth employment
  • Age-segmented
  • Statistics
  • Comparative analysis
  • Data interpretation
What to do next:
Look at other essays: