IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

You have heard that a developer plans to build a shopping center near your home. letter to the council

#developer #plans #center #home #council
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Dear Sir or Madam The reason why I am
adressing
Correct your spelling
addressing
this
 letter to you is that I heard about building a new shopping centre in my district. In my mind, it has several drawbacks and I have
solution
Fix the agreement mistake
solutions
show examples
 for them. At the outset, for the building of
shopping
Correct article usage
a shopping
show examples
 centre in the
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
 of the district many trees should be cut off. And it will be
reason
Add an article
the reason
a reason
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of
Change preposition
for
show examples
decreasing
Correct article usage
the decreasing
show examples
 oxygen.
Furthermore
,
although
 parents can buy anything comfortably, children,who live near
this
 center cannot play
safefully
Correct your spelling
safely
. Because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 big type of transports for buildings or shoppers' cars will be dangerous for them.
Additionally
,today our streets have noise pollution already,if there build
new
Add an article
a new
the new
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 big
shop
Fix the agreement mistake
shops
show examples
,noise pollution will increase
duble
Correct your spelling
double
 or triple. For the mentioned reasons,I and people in my street
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
disagree
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
Correct your spelling
construct
constru
Correct your spelling
construction
 ct it. I can recommend another place to build it. 1000
squere
Correct your spelling
square
 meters of place near
river
Add an article
the river
show examples
is
Wrong verb form
has been
show examples
 free for several decades.
Moreover
,several
skyscrappers
Correct your spelling
skyscrapers
 and buildings of
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
built
Add a missing verb
were built
show examples
 near there. If a developer
build
Change the verb form
builds
show examples
this
 shopping area in
this
 place, people can get much more advantages from
building
Add an article
the building
a building
show examples
. I hope the developer will get my recommendation and construct his building near the river. I
wait
Wrong verb form
am waiting for
show examples
reply
Correct article usage
a reply
show examples
 letter from
builder
Correct article usage
the builder
show examples
 or
Correct article usage
the goverment
show examples
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
. Yours faithfully, Kim Chin In
Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on

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task achievement
Include more specific examples to strengthen your arguments. For instance, you could mention the impact of noise on specific activities or how children's play areas might be affected.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph links logically to the next to enhance the flow of your writing. Consider using transition words or phrases for this purpose.
coherence cohesion
Clear structure with distinct introduction and conclusion.
task achievement
You have clearly addressed the task and articulated several drawbacks of the proposed shopping center.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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