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Writing Samples
Band 7

The diagrams show the changes that have taken place at West Park Secondary School since its construction in 1950

The diagrams show the changes that have taken place at West Park Secondary School since its construction in 1950
The provided diagrams illustrate the various modifications that have occurred at West
Park
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 Secondary
School
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 from its initial construction in 1950 to the present day.
Overall
Linking Words
, the most notable changes include the
substitutions
Fix the agreement mistake
substitution
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 of farmland with new buildings and facilities, the expansion of the
car
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park
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, and the introduction of a sports field, reflecting the
school
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’s adaptation to evolving educational and infrastructural needs. In 1950, the West
Park
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 Secondary
School
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 encompassed a large area of farmland and a playground situated behind the
school
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 buildings.
Additionally
Linking Words
, there were residential houses located adjacent to the
school
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. By 1980, significant changes had occurred. The houses
was
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were
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 partially replaced by a
car
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park
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 and a new science block,
while
Linking Words
 the main
school
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 building remained intact. The playground continued to exist behind these structures,
meanwhile
Add a comma
meanwhile,
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 the farmland had been substituted by the sports field. Between 1980 and 2010, the science block and the main
school
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 building remained, but the
car
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park
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 was expanded significantly by the destruction of the houses.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the sports field and playground adjacent to the main building
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
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 halved in size by
enlargement
Correct article usage
the enlargement
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 of the
car
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park
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.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words park, school, car with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "significant" was used 2 times.
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