The bar charts below show the main reasons for study among students of different age groups and the amount of support they received from employers.

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The bar charts below show the main reasons for study among students of different age groups and the amount of support they received from employers.
IELTS Writing Task Chart for The bar charts below show the main reasons for study among students of different age groups and the amount of support they received from employers.
The bar charts show the principal reasons for studying among people of different age categories and the support they are receiving from the employees.
Overall
Linking Words
, we can see that the younger group are studying for a
career
Use synonyms
, and the older bracket studies more because they are interested in that.
In addition
Linking Words
, employer help is more important for younger people and starts decreasing in the middle.
Firstly
Linking Words
, those who are under 26 study for a working
propose
Use the right word
purpose
show examples
around 80%,
while
Linking Words
only like 10% study for interest.
Similarly
Linking Words
, in the age cohort of 26 to 29,
career
Use synonyms
is still the most common reason, but the percentage is lower than before.
However
Linking Words
, when age increases, the percentage of those who study for a
career
Use synonyms
decreases.
For example
Linking Words
, the group of 40 to 49 is equal.
Finally
Linking Words
, for some over 49, interest starts becoming the main reason, with more than 70% , and
career
Use synonyms
goes to 20%.
Secondly
Linking Words
, the employer support is higher for younger generations, with 65%. After, it falls to lower than 40% for those who are 30 to 39.

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words career with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "show" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • age groups
  • career advancement
  • personal development
  • employer support
  • external aid
  • correlation
  • intrinsic motivation
  • career enhancement
  • societal impacts
  • workforce development
  • lifelong learning
  • primary reasons
  • motivation for study
  • part-time studies
  • career-oriented
  • personal interest
  • educational pursuit
  • study motivation
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