In education and employment, some people work harder than others. Why do some people work harder? Is it always a good thing to work hard?
Due to
the fierce competition in society nowadays, some individuals work
much harder than others. From my perspective, this
is due to
many factors. This
essay will discuss the reasons.
In terms of education, many students have high personal standards. Working harder can bring them a sense of excitement. If they eventually achieve great success, it can boost their confidence and motivate them to do even better. In my view, it is a golden opportunity to fulfill
personal potential and excel in specific fields.
Change the spelling
fulfil
On the other hand
, some students work
hard not because of their own desire, but due to
their parents' requirements. Furthermore
, with the intense competition and scarcity of resources in society, only individuals who achieve high academic degrees or acquire specific professional skills can secure jobs with high salaries and respect. For example
, some children are sent to online classes to learn Python, aiming to stand out in the future labor
market.
When it comes to employment, the fundamental reason is that many companies are engaged in fierce competition, which forces workers to Change the spelling
labour
work
late into the night. Moreover
, due to
family responsibilities, many adults live with both their parents and children,
and the high cost of living, Remove the comma
apply
such
as funding their children’s education and paying off mortgages, pushes them to work
harder than the younger generation to avoid being replaced.
Additionally
, as artificial intelligence rapidly develops, workers are concerned about being replaced by robots. Therefore
, they attend training courses or pursue specific certifications to improve their professional knowledge and skills.
In conclusion, I totally agree that some people work
harder than others. However
, we should strive to maintain a balance between work
and health, both mental and physical.Submitted by 2287353619 on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph targets a specific point with clear topic sentences, which will enhance logical structuring and flow.
task achievement
Elaborate more on the implications of working harder, both positive and negative, to strengthen the discussion on whether it's always good to work hard.
task achievement
The essay presents a well-rounded exploration of the topic by discussing reasons both in educational and employment contexts.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and reinforces the importance of balancing work with health.
coherence cohesion
The transition between educational and employment contexts is smooth, indicating good cohesion throughout the essay.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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