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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows the daily water consumption for Americans in their homes. Summerise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons when necessary.

The graph below shows the daily water consumption for Americans in their homes. Summerise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons when necessary.
#water #consumption #americans #homes #summerise #information #features #comparisons
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This
 bar chart depicts a comparison of
water
uses
Correct subject-verb agreement
use
show examples
for
Change preposition
by
show examples
 Americans in their home. It is measured by
gallons
 of
water
.
Overall
as
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
it can be clearly seen that
gallons
Correct article usage
the gallons
show examples
 of
water
 an
american
Change the capitalization
American
show examples
 uses without
water
conservation
 methods were greater than with
water
conservation
 methods.
According to
 the given data in the following graph, flushing
toilet
Fix the agreement mistake
toilets
show examples
 without
water
conservation
 was higher than with
water
conservation
 by 9%.
Whereas
, people who used leaks was double
than
Correct word choice
that
show examples
 with
water
conservation
 approaches by 5%.
However
,
both
 washing clothes and taking a shower were nearly similar in numbers.
On the other hand
,
both
 washing dishes and
others
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
uses had
a similar numbers
Correct the article-noun agreement
a similar number
similar numbers
show examples
 of
gallon
Fix the agreement mistake
gallons
show examples
 of
waters
Fix the agreement mistake
water
show examples
. Americans used ( 2-1 )
gallons
 of
water
 respectively in
both
 methods.
While
 using faucets remained steady and were 11
gallons
 of
water
.
Finally
, washing dishes, using faucets
as well as
 other uses had a stable number in
both
approches
Correct your spelling
approaches
.
Submitted by saroooniiq8 on

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words water, gallons, conservation, both with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • consumption
  • gallons
  • household
  • laundry
  • irrigation
  • appliances
  • sanitation
  • efficiency
  • trends
  • disparities
  • anomalies
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