IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

In many countries nowadays, consumers can go to a supermarket and buy food produced all over the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

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In the contemporary era, in numerous nations, individuals can purchase productions from a wide range of
countries
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. From my viewpoint,
this
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 is a negative advancement because it has detrimental effects on domestic manufacturers and the workforce, and
foods
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 produced by foreign factories may not be appropriate for citizens who reside in other
countries
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. On the one hand,
this
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 phenomenon can cause a lot of crises for domestic companies and workers. Indeed, if
people
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 do not buy goods that are generated by their own
countries
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, the profit of domestic firms will decrease with the passage of time.
Hence
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, bosses of these establishments have to fire some of the workforce. For a prime example, some third-world
countries
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,
such
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 as Iran are not able to produce high-quality products, and
people
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 who dwell in these
countries
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 purchase other
countries
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's productions, so only a few members of the public have an occupation in their nations and the majority of members of society do not have a job.
Thus
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,
this
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 trend can be destructive for some companies and individuals.
Further
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 and even more importantly, some of these
foods
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 are not a good choice for other
people
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 who are from other
countries
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.
Due to
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 different preferences, some
people
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 do not have a tendency to buy other
countries
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'
foods
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 or drinks;
thus
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, by purchasing these goods,
people
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 waste their money.
For instance
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, European
people
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 are not able to consume Chinese or Indian
foods
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 because they have different tastes. Not only does
this
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 task have financial downsides, but it
also
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 has a negative influence on
people
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's health. Owing to
people
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 who live in different locations having different genes, studies have shown that it is not good for
people
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 to try other nations'
foods
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. In conclusion, whenever
people
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 go to stores, they can buy different
countries
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' productions, but, in my opinion, it is not a positive trend because some domestic factories are destroyed, and, obviously, some of their staff lose their jobs, and it has awful effects on
people
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's health and budget.

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task achievement
In your introduction, be sure to set up both sides of the argument clearly before taking a stance. This will provide a more balanced view and make it easier to explain why you have chosen your position.
coherence cohesion
Each paragraph should focus on only one main idea. Try to avoid introducing new ideas within the same paragraph as it can affect logical coherence.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with a distinct introduction and conclusion.
coherence cohesion
The argument is well-captured and flows logically from introduction to conclusion.
task achievement
You used examples to support your points, which is effective in strengthening your argument.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • nutrition
  • cultural exposure
  • competitive markets
  • economic boost
  • employment opportunities
  • carbon footprint
  • environmental impact
  • local produce
  • food security
  • global supply chain
  • sustainable practices
  • consumer choice
  • market dynamics
  • price competition
  • agricultural sector
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