More and more adults have continued to live with their parents for many years after they have completed education and found jobs. Do the advantages of this choice outweigh disadvantages?

#adults #parents #years #education #jobs #choice

many adults after graduation and finding jobs continue to live with their families at the same home for many years. In

this

essay, I will discuss the advantages and disadvantages of not changing

home

Fix the agreement mistake

homes

show examples

after reaching

adults

Fix the agreement mistake

adult

show examples

age, and why I believe the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. To commence with advantages, when individuals continue to live with their

parents

and not live in private apartments helps strengthen the relationship between them by spending more time with their families and enjoy sharing the small moments together.

For instance

, when they share meals every day and talk about their daily news.

Moreover

parents

can give their children

advices

Change the wording

advice

pieces of advice

bits of advice

show examples

or support when they

need

Correct pronoun usage

need it

show examples

, or individuals help by taking care of their

parents

when they are sick or maybe by money. When we talk about disadvantages, young people

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the age of working,

they

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

should take responsibility

Change preposition

for

show examples

all aspects

Change preposition

show examples

their life including they should learn to earn money and pay for their own apartment, as for their meals, they need to learn how to

Add a missing verb

be independ

show examples

independ

Correct your spelling

independent

Change preposition

apply

show examples

themselves

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

and cook all the three meals every day,

additionally

, if they have a partner they it is necessary to live far away from their family house and live with the partner in special house. In conclusion, it is better for single

worker

Fix the agreement mistake

workers

show examples

to continue living with their

parents

and siblings for an enjoyable life

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

full of happiness and loved ones until they get married they need to move to learn how to become more independent persons.

Submitted by danall1kat on Mon Oct 21 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Provide more specific examples to support your main points. This will make your arguments more convincing and relatable.

coherence cohesion

Try to better connect your ideas by using linking words or phrases. This will enhance the logical flow of your essay.

coherence cohesion

The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing the discussion.

task achievement

The advantages of living at home are well-explained with relevant points such as strengthening family bonds and mutual support.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

253 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

financial benefit
supportive network
cultural expectations
family cohabitation
family bonds
lack of privacy
personal space
emotional dependency
mental dependency
life's pressures
inter-generational conflicts
lifestyle differences
familial relationships

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school, Do the advantages of this outweight disadvantages.
Professionals say that studying a new language from primary school will be more beneficial for the student's learning development than secondary school. I agree with this statement because learning a language as early as possible makes it easier for children's brains to recognize. In this essay, I will explain why the advantages surpass the drawbacks.
5
band
Learning English is important? Do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays, learning languages are becoming increasingly popular especially English. For many, particularly young adults, the chance to know second language. However, there are both pros and cons to deciding to do this. In this essay I will discuss some of the reasons why learning English is so popular and some of the challenges to overcome.
<4
band
the dat shows that the chages of a park from 1990 to pressnt day . summarise the information and reporting the main features and make comparisons
The pair of maps indicate that the lay out plan had changed between the year 1980 to present day.
4.5
band
In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sum of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
In some nations, some people believe that there is many advantages to use a huge money on building new railway lines for very fast trains between cities, while others think we should spent money on developing the current public transportation system. While imporving existing public transport can reduce the congestion in the city, I believe that building fast trains between cities can encourage the population of rural areas.
4.5
band
some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
According to some allowing children to make their own decisions on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a community of people who only think about their own hopes. While other people believe that it is important for children to make their own choices about matters that affect them. In my opinion, I consider that children need someone to guide them in how they make their choices.

More and more adults have continued to live with their parents for many years after they have completed education and found jobs. Do the advantages of this choice outweigh disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school, Do the advantages of this outweight disadvantages.

Learning English is important? Do you agree or disagree?

the dat shows that the chages of a park from 1990 to pressnt day . summarise the information and reporting the main features and make comparisons

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sum of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.