IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The chart below gives information about how people aged between 25 - 34 are housed in the UK. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting on the main features and make comparisons wehere relevant. Write at least 150 words.

The chart below gives information about how people aged between 25 - 34 are housed in the UK. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting on the main features and make comparisons wehere relevant. Write at least 150 words.
#information #people #uk #summarise #features #comparisons #wehere
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The chart shows the
percentage
Use synonyms
 of how
people
Use synonyms
 aged 25-34 are housed in the UK
during
Change preposition
from
show examples
 2004 to 2014.
Blue
Correct article usage
The blue
show examples
 bar means
Use synonyms
home
Correct your spelling
homeowners
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owners
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 the green bar renters. We
could
Wrong verb form
can
show examples
 see the
horizonal
Correct your spelling
horizontal
 axis is the years from 2004 to 2014, and the vertical axis is the percent.In the beginning, it was about 58%
people
Use synonyms
 who were
Use synonyms
home
Correct your spelling
homeowners
show examples
owners
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,
while
Linking Words
 20% were renters. It
is3
Correct your spelling
is
 times
difference
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different
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. But from the second year 2005,
Use synonyms
home
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
owners
Use synonyms
’
percentage
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 was in a slightly waving and decreasing trend. In 2010 it was obviously going down below 50%. In 2014, there were only 36%
people
Use synonyms
 who were
Use synonyms
home
Correct your spelling
homeowners
show examples
owners
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.
Home
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owners
Use synonyms
’
percentage
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 was down from 58% to 36%.
Linking Words
While in
Correct word choice
In
show examples
 the same period 2004 to 2014, the renters’
percentage
Use synonyms
 rose from 20% in 2004. In 2013, it was over the
percentage
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 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Use synonyms
home
Correct your spelling
homeowners
show examples
owners
Use synonyms
. And in 2014, the
percent
Replace the word
percentage
show examples
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
 up to about 48%. In conclusion, the renters’
percent
Replace the word
percentage
show examples
 was up from 20% to 48% in a decade. In 2014, most
people
Use synonyms
 aged 25-34
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
were renters in the UK.
Submitted by brierleysteven1 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Linking words: Add more linking words.
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, people, home, owners with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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