IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The chart below shows the expenditure of two countries on consumer goods in 2010.

The chart below shows the expenditure of two countries on consumer goods in 2010.
#expenditure #two #countries #consumer #goods
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The bar chart illustrates the amount of
money
Use synonyms
 spent on five consumer products including cars, computers, books, perfume and
cameras
Use synonyms
 in two different
countries
Use synonyms
 (
France
Use synonyms
 and the
UK
Use synonyms
) in the year 2010. Units are measured in
pounds
Use synonyms
 sterling.
Overall
Linking Words
, the
UK
Use synonyms
 spent most of the
money
Use synonyms
 on consumer goods than
France
Use synonyms
 in the period of time. Both
countries
Use synonyms
 spent most of their
money
Use synonyms
 on Cars
whereas
Linking Words
 the least spent
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
money
Use synonyms
 was on perfume in the
UK
Use synonyms
 compared to
cameras
Use synonyms
 in
France
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the significant difference in expenditure between the two
countries
Use synonyms
 was on
cameras
Use synonyms
. In terms of cars, the people of
Use synonyms
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
 spent around 450,000
pounds
Use synonyms
 on them as opposed to the French at 350,000
pounds
Use synonyms
.
Similarly
Linking Words
 , The British
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 higher on books than the French (around 400,000
pounds
Use synonyms
 and 300,000
pounds
Use synonyms
 respectively). In the
UK
Use synonyms
, expenditure on
cameras
Use synonyms
 was double (350,000
pounds
Use synonyms
) than the amount spent in
France
Use synonyms
 (150,000
pounds
Use synonyms
)
On the other hand
Linking Words
 , the amount of
money
Use synonyms
 paid for the remaining products was higher in
France
Use synonyms
. Above 350,000
pounds
Use synonyms
 was spent by the French on computers which was slightly more than the British who spent exactly 350,000
pounds
Use synonyms
. Neither of the
countries
Use synonyms
 spent much on perfume which accounted for 200,000
pounds
Use synonyms
 of expenditure in French but under 150,000
pounds
Use synonyms
 in the
UK
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by rifataranawshin on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Replace the words money, cameras, countries, france, uk, pounds with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • expenditure
  • consumer goods
  • chart
  • countries
  • overall
  • compare
  • analyze
  • categories
  • consumer spending
  • trends
  • proportions
  • statistics
  • increase
  • decrease
  • significant
  • notable
  • remarkable
  • substantial
  • considerable
  • determine
  • conclude
  • in conclusion
What to do next:
Look at other essays: