IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

You have recently noticed and increase in traffic in your residential area. Write a letter to the responsible person at the local council to inform him about the problem and say - Introduce yourself and describe the problem - What are the reasons for the traffic in your view - Suggest a solution to the problem.

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I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to express my concern
on
Change preposition
about
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 the rapid growth of
traffic
Use synonyms
 jams in my hometown
from
Change preposition
in
show examples
Linking Words
last
Correct article usage
the last
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coupls
Correct your spelling
couple
couples
 of months. My name is Sim, I
am
Wrong verb form
have been
show examples
 residing on
the
Correct article usage
apply
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Hurontario and Eglinton
street
Capitalize word
Street
show examples
from
Change preposition
since
show examples
 two years ago.
This
Linking Words
 is
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 first time we are facing
problem
Correct article usage
a problem
show examples
 with
traffic
Use synonyms
 it never happened before. It is making
Correct pronoun usage
it difficulties
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difficulties
Replace the word
difficult
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 for old people and
school children
Correct your spelling
schoolchildren
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 in my town. The main reason
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
Linking Words
this
Fix the agreement mistake
these
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of
Change preposition
apply
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jams is
construction
Add an article
a construction
the construction
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 which
is
Verb problem
has
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 never ending
from
Change preposition
for
show examples
Linking Words
last
Correct article usage
the last
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 six months. We have
complaints
Replace the word
complained
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 many times to
municipal
Correct article usage
the municipal
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coucil
Correct your spelling
council
 for completing it sooner but never got any response. In July,
the
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
 left
one
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
 road with
constructing
Wrong verb form
constructed
show examples
 and started opposite side,
Moreover
Linking Words
 they
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
removed the
traffic
Use synonyms
 lights. Which is one of the most dangerous things.
Everyday
Replace the word
Every day
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 there is a
traffic
Use synonyms
 controller standing on the road to help people but
still
Add a comma
still,
show examples
 it is not working. School kids have to take buses for their school
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
 so for that bus have to stop at the centre of
road
Add an article
the road
show examples
 and
that
Linking Words
is leading
Wrong verb form
leads
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 to more jams.
As well as
Linking Words
,the car drivers
donot
Correct your spelling
do not
 even stop for pedestrians,
cause
Wrong verb form
causing
show examples
 some serious problems in future if construction work
will be
Wrong verb form
is
show examples
 not done sooner. I would like to suggest
solution
Add an article
a solution
the solution
show examples
Change preposition
to
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of
Change preposition
to
show examples
this
Linking Words
 problem. By working continuously for one to
week
Add an article
a week
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 without any inconvenience construction work can be done by
company
Add an article
the company
a company
show examples
 and wherever needed the local community will help in processing. Looking forward to
hear
Wrong verb form
hearing your
show examples
 response. Yours faithfully Sim

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coherence cohesion
Consider organizing your letter into clear paragraphs, each detailing one main point, to improve coherence.
task achievement
Expand on your suggestions for resolving the traffic issue, providing more details or alternatives.
task achievement
The letter clearly introduces the writer and states the problem.
task achievement
The tone of the letter is appropriate for addressing a formal audience.
coherence cohesion
There is a clear closure with a polite sign-off, which is good for overall coherence.

The Greeting

Depending on the style and aim of the letter, you will need to adapt your greeting.

Always start an informal letter in the ways:

  • Dear + name
  • Hi / Hello + name

‘Dear...’ is more appropriate, so stick with this.

For a formal letter there are two options for the greeting:

  • Use Dear Sir or Madam if you don’t know the name of the person you are writing to.
  • Use Dear + surname if you do know their name, e.g. Dear Mr Smith or Dear Mrs Jones.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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