Some people say that in order to prevent illness and disease, government should focus on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

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this

Linking Words

21st century, the rapid growth in atmospheric changes and infrastructure issues has been seen in recent years. Few individuals think that to tackle the health problems and chronic diseases government should focus on reducing pollution and housing problems. I agree with

this

Linking Words

statement but

upto

Correct your spelling

up to

some extent and will discuss it in

following

Correct article usage

the following

show examples

To begin

Linking Words

with,

administration

Add an article

the administration

show examples

should make legal laws to stop

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

water

Use synonyms

pollution

instead

Linking Words

of making new factories. To elaborate,

chemical

Fix the agreement mistake

chemicals

show examples

are

throwing

Wrong verb form

thrown

show examples

the waste materials

Change preposition

into

show examples

rivers or oceans. Common

people

Use synonyms

consume

water

Use synonyms

from there,

after

Correct word choice

and after

show examples

drinking that

water

Use synonyms

masses are getting serious health problems.

For example

Linking Words

, in 2020 more than 100

people

Use synonyms

were

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

died

Change preposition

from

show examples

water

Use synonyms

in which high

pevel

Correct your spelling

level

levels

of sodium

was

Correct subject-verb agreement

were

show examples

found and

this

Linking Words

was published by

National

Correct article usage

the National

show examples

newspaper.

Moreover

Linking Words

, individuals who are working in factories or doing labour work do not have enough money to build shelter for themselves.

Instead

Linking Words

of constructing new parks in cities authorities should raise money to provide shelter to poor

people

Use synonyms

As well as

Linking Words

, homeless

people

Use synonyms

found difficulties in

winte

Correct your spelling

winter

wine

, specifically in January and December to find shelter.

However

Linking Words

for providing

Change preposition

to provide

show examples

good

Correct article usage

a good

show examples

education to all students,

administration

Add an article

the administration

show examples

should provide funds and loans to

student's

Fix the agreement mistake

students'

show examples

parents so that they

are

Verb problem

can

show examples

give their kids

better

Add an article

a better

show examples

education.

For instance

Linking Words

survey

Add an article

a survey

show examples

conducted by a

T.V

Correct your spelling

channel shows that

number

Change the article

a number

the number

show examples

of children going to school

Change preposition

apply

show examples

this

Linking Words

year is significantly higher.

This

Linking Words

is because of the funds which

government

Correct article usage

the government

show examples

is spending.

To conclude

Linking Words

, authorities should focus on tackling issues

such

Linking Words

as infrastructing houses and atmosphere changes

whereas

Linking Words

they should

also

Linking Words

concentrate on

another difficulties

Replace the adjective

another difficulty

other difficulties

show examples

which

Change preposition

with which

show examples

poor

people

Use synonyms

are struggling.

kaursaijbirWed Oct 23 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea and flows logically into the next. Use linking devices more effectively to connect ideas.

task achievement

Some points require further development and detail to make your argument more convincing. Ensure each point is fully explained.

task achievement

The essay addresses both environmental pollution and housing problems, which are relevant to the topic.

coherence cohesion

The essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, providing a clear structure to follow.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
27
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

269 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Environmental pollution
Public health
Respiratory diseases
Cardiovascular conditions
Infectious diseases
Mental health problems
Government intervention
Industrial emissions
Clean energy sources
Public housing policies
Safe and affordable housing
Environmental hazards
Green public spaces
Community well-being
Physical inactivity

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Some people say that in order to prevent illness and disease, government should focus on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

It is common nowadays for each member of family to have their own peace of modern technology. Some people think that this will lead to a break down in the family relationships and communication to what extent do you agree or disagree.

The best way to reduce poverty in developing countries is by giving up to six years of free education, so that they can at least read, write and use numbers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people believe that handwriting is no longer useful in the modern world and should not be taught in schools. To what extent do you agree or disagree?