More and more people are working from home rather than at the workplace. Some people say this will bring benefits to the workers and their families, But others think it will bring stressto the home. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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It has been a matter of dispute whether working from
home
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is a good idea or not. Because some people hold the opinion that it is
one
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of the main reasons
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
stress between families, But on the other side others opine that
this
Linking Words
phenomenon comes with a lot of advantages. I agree with the latter view and
i
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I
show examples
am going to explain both
approches
Correct your spelling
approaches
in upcoming paragraphs. When it comes to benefits,
i
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I
show examples
can only think of
one
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main advantage which is time-saving. Nowadays everyone has so much to do in their lives and they
are fail
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fail
show examples
to manage their time to meet
the
Correct article usage
apply
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family or
work
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commitments. In view of
this
Linking Words
problem,
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work
Wrong verb form
working
show examples
from
home
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is a blessing for them.
For instance
Linking Words
,
according to
Linking Words
the latest survey, more than eighty
percent
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per cent
show examples
of
Indian
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the Indian
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population has chosen to
work
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from
home
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, which seems to be a positive development for them. On the other side, people who are against
this
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say that it is
a
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apply
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another kind of stress that people are unable to recognize
it
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apply
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at an early stage, but when things start getting out of their control and they have to face problems,
such
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as small fights, distraction at
home
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while
Linking Words
working, not being able to focus on the job and reach the deadlines. These things are
the
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apply
show examples
red flags in the starting but can be worse after
sometime
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some time
show examples
, so to avoid these issues
work
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and family life
needs
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need
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to be
seprated
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separated
and
person
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a person
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can give proper time to his job when at
the
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apply
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work
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and to the family when
one
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is at
home
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. In conclusion, I reiterate my opinion that everything has its own time and space which needs to be maintained as it is to be able to have a good and balanced
life style
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lifestyle
show examples
,
otherwise
Linking Words
a person has to undergo serious situations which can be
deterimental
Correct your spelling
detrimental
for
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to
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one
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's life and career.
Submitted by sidhunarinder591 on

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task achievement
In the introduction, you have mentioned that you agree with the latter view, but it would be clearer if you explicitly state which view you are supporting. This will help the examiner understand your position right from the beginning.
task achievement
Expand on the benefits of working from home beyond just time-saving. Consider including ideas about flexibility, cost savings, or work-life balance. This would deepen your argument and provide a more comprehensive response to the prompt.
task achievement
Provide balanced development of both sides. In the paragraph about the advantages, more points can be included to present a fuller picture, similar to how the disadvantages have been outlined.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and is logically connected to the main question. While your essay presents valid points, enhance coherence by using linking words and phrases to connect ideas and arguments more effectively.
coherence and cohesion
A strong introduction and conclusion provide the essay with a clear beginning and end, setting the context and wrapping up the discussion well.
task achievement
You have touched upon both viewpoints about working from home, which shows an understanding of the prompt’s requirements.
coherence and cohesion
The structure generally follows a logical approach with separate paragraphs discussing the two viewpoints, which improves readability.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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