Many people believe that educational success depends on having a good teacher, while others believe that a student’s attitude is more important. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Some people argue that one of the key reasons for educational success is how students gain
information
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,
while
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others say it relates to how the individual wants it.
While
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it is clear that
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both of them are important, I assert that the intention of the student has more effect. Nowadays, seeking
information
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become an easy task, everyone has a private smartphone which can be a great source of knowledge,
for example
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, websites like Wikipedia and
Youtube
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YouTube
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can offer a wide range of subjects and sources you can learn from, no longer need to rely on a specific teacher or source.
In addition
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, the ongoing technological revolution provides much more extensive and sophisticated ways to learn a new topic,
for instance
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, the AI revolution that enables us to summarize any article or source of
information
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into a concise and relevant form. Having said that, in order to strike into a process of learning, students have to start searching for the materials they want. The
information
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does not come from nowhere,
thus
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they must want it.
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Moreover
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Moreover,
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their state of mind is imperative to the success of the process, their ambition for success is most likely what dictates how fast they grasp
information
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,
for instance
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, if they are tired or lack willingness they can repeatedly read pages without understanding them. In conclusion, the importance of how to gain
information
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is vital and
therefore
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the teacher who teaches the students has a paramount effect, but nowadays there are a variety of sources which diminish the relevance of who delivers the
information
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, and crucially a count on how much he desires it.
Submitted by dahielomer2 on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Improve the logical flow of ideas. Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next by using linking phrases or words.
Task Achievement
Expand on examples to make them more relevant and specific.
Task Achievement
Ensure that each main idea has sufficient support and evidence.
Task Achievement
The essay clearly states both views and gives the writer's own opinion, addressing the task effectively.
Coherence and Cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clear and guide the reader effectively through the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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