IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

You recently received a letter from a friend asking for advice about whether to go to college or to try to get a job. You think he/she should get a job. Write a lette to this friend. In your letter Say why he/she would not enjoy college explain why getting a good job is a good idea for him/her suggest types job that would be suitable for him/her

#friend #advice #college #job #lette #idea
Dear Jasmine, I feel so happy that you are thinking for yourself and your
carrier
Correct your spelling
career
show examples
 even when you mother of one. Since you asked me whether you should restart your
studise
Correct your spelling
study
 in a college or find a
job
 for your professional life. I would suggest you
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
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try finding a
job
 as it is been so many years
you
Correct word choice
since you
show examples
 went to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
college.
Thus
 it might be difficult to start studying plus you have a baby
Correct pronoun usage
which
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that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 means you will find it difficult
Fix the infinitive
to attend
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attend
Fix the infinitive
to attend
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 classes,
give
Verb problem
take
show examples
 exams and study. Doing a
job
 will not only help you generate
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
money for yourself but
also
 help you go out of
house
Add an article
the house
show examples
, interact with new people and make use of your education. Though you have a BA degree
so
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
it is better to find a
job
 in
administrative
Add an article
the administrative
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 field.
Moreover
 there
a
Add a missing verb
are a
show examples
lot of
job
opening
Fix the agreement mistake
openings
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 in
this
 field. It would be great if there is
Correct article usage
a possibilty
show examples
possibilty
Correct your spelling
possibility
 of you getting a
job
 in
Correct article usage
the copperate
show examples
copperate
Correct your spelling
corporate
cooperate
 field where there is work between 8am to 5pm which would be helpful to manage your house and work properly. I hope my advice can bring some help to you. Regards Simran
Submitted by preetsimran0123 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure there are clear transitions between points to improve the overall flow.
task achievement
Double-check for small errors in spelling or grammar to maintain clarity, such as 'carrier' instead of 'career' and 'copperate' instead of 'corporate'.
suitable writing tone
The letter includes a friendly and supportive tone throughout, which is appropriate for the task.
complete response
You have provided a clear reason why college might not be the best choice and have suggested a practical alternative with examples.
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